This is not the complete book, but contains
Preface vii - ix
Pages 214 - 292





(Written by Himself)




--PUBLISHED 1877--

Pages vii-ix

I WAS requested by John Doyle Lee, after he had been sentenced to be shot for the part he took in the commission of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, to publish an account of his life and confessions, in order to inform the world how it was that he had acted as he had, and why he was made a scape-goat by the Mormon Church. I accepted the trust, and, in giving publicity to the facts now, for the first time fully brought to light, I am only performing what I believe to be a duty--to him, and to the public.
The Mountain Meadows Massacre stands without a parallel amongst the crimes that stain the pages of American history. It was a crime committed without cause or justification of any kind to relieve it of its fearful character. Over one hundred and twenty men, women and children were surrounded by Indians, and more cruel whites, and kept under constant fire, from hundreds of unerring rifles, for five days and nights, during all of which time, the emigrants were famishing for water. When nearly exhausted from fatigue and thirst, they were approached by white men, with a flag of truce, and induced to surrender their arms, under the most solemn promises of protection. They were then murdered in cold blood, and left nude and mangled upon the plain. All this was done by a band of fanatics, who had no cause of complaint against the emigrants, except that the authorities of the Mormon Church had decided that all the emigrants who were old enough to talk, should die--revenge for alleged insults to Brigham Young, and the booty of the plundered train being the inciting causes of the massacre.
John D. Lee was one, and only one of fifty-eight Mormons, who there carried out the orders of the Mormon Priesthood. He has died for his crimes-shall the others escape?
The entire history of this atrocious crime is given in the confession. How it was done, and why it was the wish of the Mor-

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mons that it should be done, all Is fully stated. As one of the attorneys for John D. Lee, I did all that I could to save his life. My associates were, and are able men and fine lawyers, but fact and fate united to turn the verdict against us. The history of the first and second trials is familiar to most of the American people; therefore, I will not describe them here, any more than to say, Mormonism prevented conviction at the first trial, and at the second trial Mormonism insured conviction.
After Brigham Young and his worshipers had deserted Lee, and marked him as the victim that should suffer to save the Church from destruction, on account of the crimes it had ordered; after all chances of escape had vanished, and death was certain as the result of the life-long service be had rendered the Church, the better nature of Lee overcame his superstition and fanaticism, and he gave to me the history of his life, and his confession of the facts connected with the massacre, and wished me to have the same published. Why he refused to confess at an earlier day, and save his own life by placing the guilt where it of right belonged, is a question which is answered by the statement, that he was still a slave to his Endowment and Danite oaths, and trusted until too late to the promises of protection made to him by Brigham Young. John D. Lee was a fanatic, and as such, believed in the Mormon Church, and aided in carrying out the orders of that Church. I believe it is my duty to publish this work, to show mankind the fruits resulting from obedience to Mormon leaders, and to show that Mormonism was as certainly the cause of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, as it is that fanaticism has been the mother of crime in all ages of the world. I also wish the American people to read the facts, as they are told by a mistaken and fanatical follower of the Mormon doctrines, yet, one who was a brave man, and, according to his ideas and teaching, a good man; who did not believe he was doing wrong when obeying the commands of the Mormon Priesthood. I wish the American people to read this work, and then say, if they can, what should be the fate of those who caused the crime to be committed. The following pages contain simply true copies of material, furnished me by John D. Lee, for the purpose of being published; all of which was written by him while in prison, and after the jury had returned its verdict of guilty.
I have no excuses to offer for publishing the work just as it

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is. It is what it purport. to be, a full history of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, and also a sketch of the life of John D. Lee, embracing a revelation of the secret history of Mormonism, from its inception down to the death of Lee; with a correct copy of his confession as given to me for publication. If any feel injured by the facts, I cannot help it. If this publication shall, in any degree, aid in securing the much needed legislation, demanded by the American citizens of Utah, from the National Government, so that Church criminals, as well as Gentiles, can be convicted in Utah, I shall feel that I have been paid well for all the vexations I have endured in the land of the Saints, where they murder men, women and children for the glory of God, and the upbuilding of His kingdom.
I also believe this publication will be an advantage to the large number of naturally good and honest people, who inhabit Utah, who joined the Church, and moved to Utah, believing it their Christian duty to do so. To that class of people I am indebted for many favors, and wish them future prosperity.

Confidential Att'y of John D. Lee.

Pioche, Nevada, May 17, 1877.

Pages 213-248



AS A DUTY to myself, my family, and mankind at large, I propose to give a full and true statement of all that I know and all that I did in that unfortunate affair, which has cursed my existence, and made me a wanderer from place to place for the last nineteen years, and which is known to the world as the MOUNTAIN MEADOWS MASSACRE.
I have no vindictive feeling against any one; no enemies to punish by this statement; and no friends to shield by keeping back, or longer keeping secret, any of the facts connected with the Massacre.
I believe that I must tell all that I do know, and tell everything just as the same transpired. I shall tell the truth and permit the public to judge who is most to blame for the crime that I am accused of committing. I did not act alone; I had many to assist me at the Mountain Meadows. I believe that most of those who were connected with the Massacre, and took part in the lamentable transaction that has blackened the character of all who were aiders or abettors in the same, were acting under the impression that they were performing a religious duty. I know all were acting under the orders and by the command of their Church leaders; and I firmly believe that the most of those who took part in the proceedings, considered it a religious duty to unquestioningly obey the orders which they had received. That they acted from a sense of duty to the Mormon Church, I

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never doubted. Believing that those with me acted from a sense of religious duty on that occasion, I have faithfully kept the secret of their guilt, and remained silent and true to the oath of secrecy which we took on the bloody field, for many long and bitter years. I have never betrayed those who acted with me and participated in the crime for which I am convicted, and for which I am to suffer death.
My attorneys, especially Wells Spicer and Wm. W. Bishop, have long tried, but tried in vain, to induce me to tell all I knew of the massacre and the causes which led to it. I have heretofore refused to tell the tale. Until the last few days I had in tended to die, if die I must, without giving one word to the public concerning those who joined willingly, or unwillingly, in the work of destruction at Mountain Meadows.
To hesitate longer, or to die in silence, would be unjust and cowardly. I will not keep the secret any longer as my own, but will tell all I know.
At the earnest request of a few remaining friends, and by the advice of Mr. Bishop, my counsel, who has defended me thus far with all his ability, notwithstanding my want of money with which to pay even his expenses while attending to my case, I have concluded to write facts as I know them to exist.
I cannot go before the Judge of the quick and the dead with out first revealing all that I know, as to what was done, who ordered me to do what I did do, and the motives that led to the commission of that unnatural and bloody deed.
The immediate orders for the killing of the emigrants came from those in authority at Cedar City. At the time of the massacre, I and those with me, acted by virtue of positive orders from Isaac C. Haight and his associates at Cedar City. Before I started on my mission to the Mountain Meadows, I was told by Isaac C. Haight that his orders to me were the result of full consultatation [sic] with Colonel William H. Dame and all in authority. It is a new thing to me, if the massacre was not decided on by the head men of the Church, and it is a new thing for Mormons to condemn those who committed the deed.
Being forced to speak from memory alone, without the aid of my memorandum books, and not having time to correct the statements that I make, I will necessarily give many things out of their regular order. The superiority that I claim for my statement is this:

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I will begin my statement by saying, I was born on the 6th day of September, A. D. 1812, in the town of Kaskaskia, Randolph County, State of Illinois. I am therefore in the sixty-fifth year of my age.
I joined the Mormon Church at Far West, Mo., about thirty-nine years ago. To be with that Church and people I left my home on Luck Creek, Fayette County, Illinois, and went and joined the Mormons in Missouri, before the troubles at Gallatin, Far West and other points, between the Missourians and Mormons. I shared the fate of my brother Mormons, in being mistreated, arrested, robbed and driven from Missouri in a destitute condition, by a wild and fanatical mob. But of all this I shall speak in my life, which I shall write for publication if I have time to do so.
I took an active part with the leading men at Nauvoo in building up that city. I induced many Saints to move to Nauvoo, for the sake of their souls. I traveled and preached the Mormon doctrine in many States. I was an honored man in the Church, and stood high with the Priesthood, until the last few years. I am now cut off from the Church for obeying the orders of my superiors, and doing so without asking questions--for doing as my religion and my religious teachers had taught me to do. I am now used by the Mormon Church as a scape-goat to carry the sins of that people. My life is to be taken, so that my death may stop further enquiry into the acts of the members who are still in good standing in the Church. Will my death satisfy the nation for all the crimes committed by Mormons, at the command of the Priesthood, who have used and now have deserted me? Time will tell. I believe in a just God, and I know the day will come when others must answer for their acts, as I have had to do.
I first became acquainted with Brigham Young when I went to Far West, Mo., to join the Church, in 1837. I got very intimately acquainted with all the great leaders of the Church. I was adopted by Brigham Young as one of his sons, and for many years I confess I looked upon him as an inspired and holy man. While in Nauvoo I took an active part in all that was done for the Church or the city. I had charge of the building of the "Seventy Hall;" I was 7th Policeman. My duty as a police

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man was to guard the residence and person of Joseph Smith, the Prophet. After the death of Joseph and Hyrum I was ordered to perform the same duty for Brigham Young. When Joseph Smith was a candidate for the Presidency of the United States I went to Kentucky as the chairman of the Board of Elders, or head of the delegation, to secure the vote of that State for him. When I returned to Nauvoo again I was General Clerk and Recorder for the Quorum of the Seventy. I was also head or Chief Clerk for the Church, and as such took an active part in organizing the Priesthood into the order of Seventy after the death of Joseph Smith.
After the destruction of Nauvoo, when the Mormons were driven from the State of Illinois, I again shared the fate of my brethren, and partook of the hardships and trials that befel [sic] them from that day up to the settlement of Salt Lake City, in the then wilderness of the nation. I presented Brigham Young with seventeen ox teams, fully equipped, when he started with the people from Winter Quarters to cross the plains to the new resting place of the Saints. He accepted them and said, "God bless you, John." But I never received a cent for them--I never wanted pay for them, for in giving property to Brigham Young I thought I was loaning it to the Lord.
After reaching Salt Lake City I stayed there but a short time, when I went to live at Cottonwood, where the mines were afterwards discovered by General Connor and his men during the late war.
I was just getting fixed to live there, when I was ordered to go out into the interior and aid in forming new settlements, and opening up the country. I then had no wish or desire, save that to know and be able to do the will of the Lord's anointed, Brigham Young, and until within the last few years I have never had a wish for anything else except to do his pleasure, since I became his adopted son. I believed it my duty to obey those in authority. I then believed that Brigham Young spoke by direction of the God of Heaven. I would have suffered death rather than have disobeyed any command of his. I had this feeling until he betrayed and deserted me. At the command of Brigham Young, I took one hundred and twenty-one men, went in a southern direction from Salt Lake City, and laid out and built up Parowan. George A. Smith was the leader and chief man in authority in that settlement. I acted under him

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as historian and clerk of the Iron County Mission, until January, 1851. I went with Brigham Young, and acted as a committee man, and located Provo, St. George, Fillmore, Parowan and other towns, and managed the location of many of the settlements in Southern Utah.
In 1852, I moved to Harmony, and built up that settlement. I remained there until the Indians declared war against the whites and drove the settlers into Cedar City and Parowan, for protection, in the year 1853.
I removed my then numerous family to Cedar City, where I was appointed a Captain of the militia, and commander of Cedar City Military Post.
I had commanded at Cedar City about one year, when I was ordered to return to Harmony, and build the Harmony Fort. This order, like all other orders, came from Brigham Young. When I returned to Harmony and commenced building the fort there, the orders were given by Brigham Young for the reorganization of the military at Cedar City. The old men were requested to resign their offices, and let younger men be appointed in their place. I resigned my office of Captain, but Isaac C. Haight and John M. Higbee refued [sic] to resign, and continued to hold on as Majors in the Iron Militia.
After returning to Harmony, I was President of the civil and local affairs, and Rufus Allen was President of that Stake of Zion, or head of the Church affairs.
I soon resigned my position as President of civil affairs, and became a private citizen, and was in no office for some time. In fact, I never held any position after that, except the office of Probate Judge of the County (which office I held before and after the massacre), and member of the Territorial Legislature, and Delegate to the Constitutional Convention which met and adopted a constitution for the State of Deseret, after the massacre.
I will here state that Brigham Young honored me in many ways after the affair at Mountain Meadows was fully reported to him by me, as I will more fully state hereafter in the course of what I have to relate concerning that unfortunate transaction.
Klingensmith, at my first trial, and White, at my last trial, swore falsely when they say that they met me near Cedar City, the Sunday before the massacre. They did not meet me as they have sworn, nor did they meet me at all on that occasion or on

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any similar occasion. I never had the conversations with them that they testify about. They are both perjurers, and bore false testimony against me.
There has never been a witness on the stand against me 'that has testified to the whole truth. Some have told part truth, while others lied clear through, but all of the witnesses who were at the massacre have tried to throw all the blame on me, and to protect the other men who took part in it.
About the 7th of September, 1857, I went to Cedar City from my home at Harmony, by order of President Haight. I did not know what he wanted of me, but he had ordered me to visit him and I obeyed. If I remember correctly, it was on Sunday evening that I went there. When I got to Cedar City, I met Isaac C. Haight on the public square of the town. Haight was then President of that Stake of Zion, and the highest man in the Mormon priesthood in that country, and next to Wm. H. Dame in all of Southern Utah, and as Lieutenant Colonel he was second to Dame in the command of the Iron Military District. The word and command of Isaac C. Haight were the law in Cedar City, at that time, and to disobey his orders was certain death; be they right or wrong, no Saint was permitted to question them, their duty was obedience or death.
When I met Haight, I asked him what he wanted with me. He said he wanted to have a long talk with me on private and particular business. We took some blankets and went over to the old Iron Works, and lay there that night, so that we could talk in private and in safety. After we got to the Iron Works, Haight told me all about the train of emigrants. He said (and I then believed every word that be spoke, for I believed it was an impossible thing for one so high in the Priesthood as he was, to be guilty of falsehood) that the emigrants were a rough and abusive set of men. That they had, while traveling through Utah, been very abusive to all the Mormons they met. That they had insulted, outraged, and ravished many of the Mormon women. That the abuses heaped upon the people by the emigrants during their trip from Provo to Cedar City, had been constant and shameful; that they had burned fences and destroyed growing crops; that at many points on the road they had poisoned the water, so that all people and stock that drank of the water became sick, and many had died from the effects of poison. That these vile Gentiles publicly proclaimed that they had the very

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pistol with which the Prophet, Joseph Smith, was murdered, and had threatened to kill Brigham Young and all of the Apostles. That when in Cedar City they said they would have friends in Utah who would hang Brigham Young by the neck until he was dead, before snow fell again in the Territory.. They also said that Johnston was coming, with his army, from the East, and they were going to return from California with soldiers, as soon as possible, and would then desolate the land, and kill every d--d Mormon man, woman and child that they could find in Utah. That they violated the ordinances of the town of Cedar, and had, by armed force, resisted the officers who tried to arrest them for violating the law. That after leaving Cedar City the emigrants camped by the company, or cooperative field, just below Cedar City, and burned a large portion of the fencing, leaving the crops open to the large herds of stock in the surrounding country. Also that they had given poisoned meat to the Corn Creek tribe of Indians, which had killed several of them, and their Chief, Konosh, was on the trail of the emigrants, and would soon attack them. All of these things, and much more of a like kind, Haight told me as we lay in the dark at the old Iron Works. I believed all that he said, and, thinking that he had full right to do all that he wanted to do, I was easily induced to follow his instructions.
Haight said that unless something was done to prevent it, the emigrants would carry out their threats and rob every one of the outlying settlements in the South, and that the whole Mormon people were liable to be butchered by the troops that the emigrants would bring back with them from California. I was then told that the Council had held a meeting that day, to consider the matter, and that it was decided by the authorities to arm the Indians, give them provisions and ammunition, and send them after the emigrants, and have the Indians give them a brush, and if they killed part or all of them, so much the better.
I said, "Brother Haight, who is your authority for acting in this way?"
He replied, "It is the will of all in authority. The emigrants have no pass from any one to go through the country, and they are liable to be killed as common enemies, for the country is at war now. No man has a right to go through this country without a written pass."
We lay there and talked much of the night, and during that

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time Haight gave me very full instructions what to do, and how to proceed in the whole affair. He said he had consulted with Colonel Dame, and every one agreed to let the Indians use up the whole train if they could. Haight then said:
"I expect you to carry out your orders."
I knew I had to obey or die. I had no wish to disobey, for I then thought that my superiors in the Church were the mouth pieces of Heaven, and that it was an act of godliness for me to obey any and all orders given by them to me, without my asking any questions.
My orders were to go home to Harmony, and see Carl Shirts, my son-in-law, an Indian interpreter, and send him to the Indians in the South, to notify them that the Mormons and Indians were at war with the "Mericats" (as the Indians called all whites that were not Mormons) and bring all the Southern Indians up and have them join with those from the North, so that their force would be sufficient to make a successful attack on the emigrants.
It was agreed that Haight would send Nephi Johnson, another Indian interpreter, to stir up all the other Indians that he could find, in order to have a large enough force of Indians to give the emigrants a good hush. He said, "These are the orders that have been agreed upon by the Council, and it is in accordance with the feelings of the entire people."
I asked him if it would not have been better to first send to Brigham Young for instructions, and find out what he thought about the matter.
"No," said Haight, "that is unnecessary, we are acting by orders. Some of the Indians are now on the war-path, and all of them must be sent out; all must go, so as to make the thing a success.
It was then intended that the Indians should kill the emigrants, and make it an Indian massacre, and not have any whites interfere with them. No whites were to be known in the matter, it was to be all done by the Indians, so that it could be laid to them, if any questions were ever asked about it. I said to Haight:
"You know what the Indians are. They will kill all the party, women and children, as well as the men, and you know we are sworn not to shed innocent blood."
"Oh h--l!" said he, "there will not be one drop of innocent

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blood shed, if every one of the d--d pack are killed, for they are the worse lot of out-laws and ruffians that I ever saw in my life."
We agreed upon the whole thing, how each one should act, and then left the iron works, and went to Haight's house and, got breakfast.
After breakfast I got ready to start, and Haight said to me:
"Go, Brother Lee, and see that the instructions of those in authority are obeyed, and as you are dutiful in this, so shall your reward be in the kingdom of God, for God will bless those who willingly obey counsel, and make all things fit for the people in these last days."
I left Cedar City for my home at Harmony, to carry out the instructions that I had received from my superior.
I then believed that he acted by the direct order and command of William H. Dame, and others even higher in authority than Colonel Dame. One reason for thinking so was from a talk I had only a few days before, with Apostle George A. Smith, and he had just then seen Haight, and talked with him, and I knew that George A. Smith never talked of things that Brigham Young had not talked over with him before-hand. Then the Mormons were at war with the United States, and the orders to the Mormons had been all the time to kill and waste away our enemies, but lose none of our people. These emigrants were from the section of country most hostile to our people, and I believed then as I do now, that it was the will of every true Mormon in Utah, at that time, that the enemies of the Church should be killed as fast as possible, and that as this lot of people had men amongst them that were supposed to have helped kill the Prophets in the Carthage jail, the killing of all of them would be keeping our oaths and avenging the blood of the Prophets.
In justice to myself I will give the facts of my talk with George A. Smith.
In the latter part of the month of August, 1857, about ten days before the company of Captain Fancher, who met their doom at Mountain Meadows, arrived at that place, General George A. Smith called on me at one of my homes at Washington City, Washington County, Utah Territory, and wished me to take him round by Fort Clara, via Pinto Settlements, to Hamilton Fort, or Cedar City. He said,
"I have been sent down here by the old Boss, Brigham Young,

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to Instruct the brethren of the different settlements not to sell any of their grain to our enemies. And to tell them not, to feed it to their animals, for it will all be needed by ourselves. I am also to instruct the brethren to prepare for a big fight, for the enemy is coming in large force to attempt our destruction. But Johnston's army will not be allowed to approach our settlements from the east. God is on our side and will fight our battles for us, and deliver our enemies into our hands. Brigham Young has received revelations from God, giving him the right and the power to call down the curse of God on all our enemies who attempt to invade our Territory. Our greatest danger lies in the people of California--a class of reckless miners who are strangers to God and his righteousness. They are likely to come upon us from the south and destroy the small settlements. But we will try and outwit them before we suffer much damage. The people of the United States who oppose our Church and people are a mob, from the President down, and as such it is impossible for their armies to prevail against the Saints who have gathered here in the mountains."
He continued this kind of talk for some hours to me and my friends who were with me.
General George A. Smith held high rank as a military leader. He was one of the twelve apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, and as such he was considered by me to be an inspired man. His orders were to me sacred commands, which I considered it my duty to obey, without question or hesitation.
I took my horses and carriage and drove with him to either Hamilton Fort or Cedar City, visiting the settlements with him, as he had requested. I did not go to hear him preach at any of our stopping places, nor did I pay attention to what he said to the leaders in the settlements.
The day we left Fort Clara, which was then the headquarters of the Indian missionaries under the presidency of Jacob Hamblin, we stopped to noon at the Clara River. While there the Indians gathered around us in large numbers, and were quite saucy and impudent. Their chiefs asked me where I was going and who I had with me. I told them that he was a big captain.
"Is he, a Mericat Captain?"
"No," I said, "he is a Mormon."

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The Indians then wanted to know more. They wanted to have a talk.
The General told me to tell the Indians that the Mormons were their friends, and that the Americans were their enemies, and the enemies of the Mormons, too; that he wanted the Indians to remain the fast friends of the Mormons, for the Mormons were all friends to the Indians; that the Americans had a large army just east of the mountains, and intended to come over the mountains into Utah and kill all of the Mormons and Indians in Utah Territory; that the Indians must get ready and keep ready for war against all of the Americans, and keep friendly with the Mormons and obey what the Mormons told them to do--that this was the will of the Great Spirit; that if the Indians were true to the Mormons and would help them against their enemies, then the Mormons would always keep them from want and sickness and give them guns and ammunition to hunt and kill game with, and would also help the Indians against their enemies when they went into war.
This talk pleased the Indians, and they agreed to all that I asked them to do.
I saw that my friend Smith was a little nervous and fearful of the Indians, notwithstanding their promises of friendship. To relieve him of his anxiety I hitched up and started on our way, as soon as I could do so without rousing the suspicions of the Indians.
We had ridden along about a mile or so when General Smith said,
"Those are savage looking fellows. I think they would make it lively for an emigrant train if one should come this way."
I said I thought they would attack any train that would come in their way. Then the General was in a deep study for some time, when he said,
"Suppose an emigrant train should come along through this southern country, making threats against our people and bragging of the part they took in helping kill our Prophets, what do you think the brethren would do with them? Would they be permitted to go their way, or would the brethren pitch into them and give them a good drubbing?"
I reflected a few moments, and then said,
"You know the brethren are now under the influence of the late reformation, and are still red-hot for the gospel. The

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brethren believe the government wishes to destroy them. I really believe that any train of emigrants that may come through here will be attacked, and. probably all destroyed. I am sure they would be wiped out if they had been making threats again our people. Unless emigrants have a pass from Brigham Young, or some one in authority, they will certainly never get safely through this country."
My reply pleased him very much, and he laughed heartily, and then said,
"Do you really believe the brethren would make it lively for such a train?"
I said, "Yes, sir, I know they will, unless they are protected by a pass, and I wish to inform you that unless you want every train captured that comes through here, you must inform Governor Young that if he wants emigrants to pass, without being molested, he must send orders to that effect to Colonel Wm. H. Dame or Major Isaac C. Haight, so that they can give passes to the emigrants, for their passes will insure safety, but nothing else will, except the positive orders of Governor Young, as the people are all bitter against the Gentiles, and full of religious zeal, and anxious to avenge the blood of the Prophets."
The only reply he made was to the effect that on his way down from Salt Lake City he had had a long talk with Major Haight on the same subject, and that Haight had assured him, and given him to understand, that emigrants who came along without a pass from Governor Young could not escape from the Territory.
We then rode along in silence for some distance, when he again turned to me and said,
"Brother Lee, I am satisfied that the brethren are under the full influence of the reformation, and I believe they will do just as you say they will with the wicked emigrants that come through the country making threats and abusing our people."
I repeated my views to him, but at much greater length, giving my reasons in full for thinking that Governor Young should give orders to protect all the emigrants that he did not wish destroyed. I went into a full statement of the wrongs of our people, and told him that the people were under the blaze of the reformation, full of wild fire and fanaticism, and that to shed the blood of those who would dare to speak against the Mormon Church or its leaders, they would consider doing the

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will of God, and that the people would do it as willingly and cheerfully as they would any other duty. That the apostle Paul, when he started forth to persecute the followers of Christ, was not any more sincere than every Mormon was then, who lived in Southern Utah.
My words served to cheer up the General very much; he was greatly delighted, and said,
"I am glad to hear so good an account of our people. God will bless them for all that they do to build up His Kingdom in the last days."
General Smith did not say one word to me or intimate to me, that he wished any emigrants to pass in safety through the Territory. But he led me to believe then, as I believe now, that he did want, and expected every emigrant to be killed that undertook to pass through the Territory while we were at war with the Government. I thought it was his mission to prepare the people for the bloody work.
I have always believed, since that day, that General George A. Smith was then visiting Southern Utah to prepare the people for the work of exterminating Captain Fancher's train of emigrants, and I now believe that he was sent for that purpose by the direct command of Brigham Young.
I have been told by Joseph Wood, Thomas T. Willis, and many others, that they heard George A. Smith preach at Cedar City during that trip, and that he told the people of Cedar City that the emigrant's were coming, and he told them that they must not sell that company any grain or provisions of any kind, for they were a mob of villains and outlaws, and the enemies of God and the Mormon people.
Sidney Littlefield, of Panguitch, has told me that he was knowing to the fact of Colonel Wm. H. Dame sending orders from Parowan to Maj. Haight, at Cedar City, to exterminate the Francher [sic] outfit, and to kill every emigrant without fail. Littlefield then lived at Parowan, and Dame was the Presiding Bishop. Dame still has all the wives he wants, and is a great friend of Brigham Young.
The knowledge of how George A. Smith felt toward the emigrants, and his telling me that he had a long talk with Haight on the subject, made me certain that it was the wish of the Church authorities that Francher [sic] and his train should be wiped out, and knowing all this, I did not doubt then, and I do not

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doubt it now, either, that Haight was acting by full authority from the Church leaders, and that the orders he gave to me were just the orders that he had been directed to give, when he ordered me to raise the Indians and have them attack the emigrants.
I acted through the whole matter in a way that I considered it my religious duty to act, and if what I did was a crime, it was a crime of the Mormon Church, and not a crime for which I feel individually responsible.
I must here state that Klingensmith was not in Cedar City that Sunday night. Haight said he had sent Klingensmith and others over towards Pinto, and around there, to stir up the Indians and force them to attack the emigrants.
On my way from Cedar City to my home at Harmony, I came up with a large band of Indians under Moquetas and Big Bill, two Cedar City Chiefs; they were in their war paint, and fully equipped for battle. They halted when I came up and said they had had a big talk with Haight, Higby and Klingensmith, and had got orders from them to follow up the emigrants and kill them all, and take their property as the spoil of their enemies.
These Indians wanted me to go with them and command their forces. I told them that I could not go with them that evening, that I had orders from Haight, the big Captain, to send other Indians on the war-path to help them kill the emigrants, and that I must attend to that first; that I wanted them to go on near where the emigrants were and camp until the other Indians joined them; that I would meet them the next day and lead them.
This satisfied them, but they wanted me to send my little Indian boy, Clem, with them. After some time I consented to let Clem go with them, and I returned home.
When I got home I told Carl Shirts what the orders were that Haight had sent to him. Carl was naturally cowardly and was not willing to go, but I told him the orders must be obeyed. He then started off that night, or early next morning, to stir up the Indians of the South, and lead them against the emigrants. The emigrants were then camped at Mountain Meadows.
The Indians did not obey my instructions. They met, several hundred strong, at the Meadows, and attacked the emigrants Tuesday morning, just before daylight, and at the first fire, as I afterwards learned, they killed seven and wounded sixteen of

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the emigrants. The latter fought bravely, and repulsed the Indians, killing some of them and breaking the knees of two war chiefs, who afterwards died.
The news of the battle was carried all over the country by Indian runners, and the excitement was great in all the small settlements. I was notified of what had taken place, early Tuesday morning, by an Indian who came to my house and gave me a full account of all that had been done. The Indian said it was the wish of all the Indians that I should lead them, and that I must go back with him to the camp.
I started at once, and by taking the Indian trail over the mountain, I reached the camp in about twelve miles from Harmony. To go round by the wagon road it would have been between forty and fifty miles.
When I reached the camp I found the Indians in a frenzy of excitement. They threatened to kill me unless I agreed to lead them against the emigrants, and help them kill them. They also said they had been told that they could kill the emigrants without danger to themselves, but they had lost some of their braves, and others were wounded, and unless they could kill all the "Mericats," as they called them, they would declare war against the Mormons and kill every one in the settlements.
I did as well as I could under the circumstances. I was the only white man there, with a wild and excited band of several hundred Indians. I tried to persuade them that all would be well, that I was their friend and would see that they bad their revenge, if I found out that they were entitled to revenge.
My talk only served to increase their excitement, and being afraid that they would kill me if I undertook to leave them, and I would not lead them against the emigrants, so I told them that I would go south and meet their friends, and hurry them up to help them. I intended to put a stop to the carnage if I had the power, for I believed that the emigrants had been sufficiently punished for what they had done, and I felt then, and always have felt that such wholesale murdering was wrong.
At first the Indians would not consent for me to leave them, but they finally said I might go and meet their friends.
I then got on my horse and left the Meadows, and went south.
I had gone about sixteen miles, when I met Carl Shirts with about one hundred Indians, and a number of Mormons from the southern settlements. They were going to the scene of the con-

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flict. How they learned of the emigrants being at the Meadows I never knew, but they did know it, and were there fully armed, and determined to obey orders.
Amongst those that I remember to have met there, were Samuel Knight, Oscar Hamblin, William Young, Carl Shirts, Harrison Pearce, James Pearce, John W. Clark, William Slade, Sr., James Matthews, Dudley Leavitt, William Hawley, (now a resident of Fillmore, Utah Territory,) William Slade, Jr., and two others whose names I have forgotten. I think they were George W. Adair and John Hawley. I know they were at the Meadows at the time of the massacre, and I think I met them that night south of the Meadows, with Samuel Knight and the others.
The whites camped there that night with me, but most of the Indians rushed on to their friends at the camp on the Meadows.
I reported to the whites all that had taken place at the Meadows, but none of them were surprised in the least. They all seemed to know that the attack was to be made, and all about it. I spent one of the most miserable nights there that I ever passed in my life. I spent much of the night in tears and at prayer. I wrestled with God for wisdom to guide me. I asked for some sign, some evidence that would satisfy me that my mission was of Heaven, but I got no satisfaction from my God.
In the morning we all agreed to go on together to Mountain Meadows, and camp there, and then send a messenger to Haight, giving him full instructions of what had been done, and to ask him for further instructions. We knew that the original plan was for the Indians to do all the work, and the whites to do nothing, only to stay back and plan for them, and encourage them to do the work. Now we knew the Indians could not do the work, and we were in a sad fix.
I did not then know that a messenger had been sent to Brigham Young for instructions. Haight had not mentioned it to me. I now think that James Haslem was sent to Brigham Young, as a sharp play on the part of the authorities to protect themselves, if trouble ever grew out of the matter.
We went to the Meadows and camped at the springs, about half a mile from the emigrant camp. There was a larger number of Indians there then, fully three hundred, and I think as many as four hundred of them. The two Chiefs who were shot in the knee were in a bad fix. The Indians had killed a number of the emigrants' horses, and about sixty or seventy head

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of cattle were lying dead on the Meadows, which the Indians bad killed for spite and revenge.
Our company killed a small beef for dinner, and after eating a hearty meal of it we held a council and decided to send a messenger to Haight. I said to the messenger, who was either Edwards or Adair, (I cannot now remember which it was), "Tell Haight, for my sake, for the people's sake, for God's sake, send me help to protect and save these emigrants, and pacify the Indians."
The messenger started for Cedar City, from our camp on the Meadows, about 2 o'clock P. M.
We all staid [sic] on the field, and I tried to quiet and pacify the Indians, by telling them that I had sent to Haight, the Big Captain, for orders, and when he sent his order I would know what to do. This appeared to satisfy the Indians, for said they,
"The Big Captain will send you word to kill all the Mericats."
Along toward evening the Indians again attacked the emigrants. This was Wednesday. I heard the report of their guns, and the screams of the women and children in the corral.
This was more than I could stand. So I ran with William Young and John Mangum, to where the Indians were, to stop the fight. While on the way to them they fired a volley, and three balls from their guns cut my clothing. One ball went through my hat and cut my hair on the side of my head. One ball went through my shirt and leaded my shoulder, the other cut my pants across my bowels. I thought this was rather warm work, but I kept on until I reached the place where the Indians were in force. When I got to them, I told them the Great Spirit would be mad at them if they killed the women and children. I talked to them some time, and cried with sorrow when I saw that I could not pacify the savages.
When the Indians saw me in tears, they called me "Yaw Guts," which in the Indian language means "cry baby," and to this day they call me by that name, and consider me a coward.
Oscar Hamblin was a fine interpreter, and he came to my aid and helped me to induce the Indians to stop the attack. By his help we got the Indians to agree to be quiet until word was returned from Haight. (I do not know now but what the messenger started for Cedar City, after this night attack, but I was so worried and perplexed at that time, and so much has hap-

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pened to distract my thoughts since then, that my mind is not clear on that subject.)
On Thursday, about noon, several men came to us from Cedar City. I cannot remember the order in which all of the people came to the Meadows, but I do recollect that at this time and in this company Joel White, William C. Stewart, Benjamin Arthur, Alexander Wilden, Charles Hopkins and ---- Tate, came to us at the camp at the Springs. These men said but little, but every man seemed to know just what he was there for. As our messenger had gone for further orders, we moved our camp about, four hundred yards further up the valley on to a hill, where we made camp as long as we staid [sic] there. I soon learned that the whites were as wicked at heart as the Indians, for every little while during that day I saw white men. taking aim and shooting at the emigrants' wagons. They said they were doing it to keep in practice and to help pass off the time.
I remember one man that was shooting, that rather amused me, for he was shooting at a mark over a quarter of a mile off, and his gun would not carry a ball two hundred yards. That man was Alexander Wilden. He took pains to fix up a seat under the shade of a tree, where he continued to load and shoot until he got tired. Many of the others acted just as wild and foolish as Wilden did.
The wagons were corraled [sic] after the Indians had made the first attack. On the second day after our arrival the emigrants drew their wagons near each other and chained the wheels one to the other. While they were doing this there was no shooting going on. Their camp was about one hundred yards above and north of the spring. They generally got their water from the spring at night.
Thursday morning I saw two men start from the corral with buckets, and run to the spring and fill their buckets with water, and go back again. The bullets flew around them thick and fast, but they got into their corral in safety.
The Indians had agreed to keep quiet until orders returned from Haight, but they did not keep their word. They made a determined attack on the train on Thursday morning about daylight. At this attack the Clara Indians had one brave killed and three wounded. This so enraged that band that they left for

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home that day and drove off quite a number of cattle with them. During the day I said to John Mangum,
"I will cross over the valley and go up on the other side, on the hills to the west of the corral, and take a look at the situation."
I did go. As I was crossing the valley I was seen by the emigrants, and as soon as they saw that I was a white man they ran up a white flag in the middle of their corral, or camp. They 'then sent two little boys from the camp to talk to me, but I could not talk to them at that time, for I did not know what orders Haight would send back to me, and until I did know his orders I did not know how to act. I hid, to keep away from the children. They came to the place where they had last seen me and hunted all around for me, but being unable to find me, they turned and went back to the camp in safety.
While the boys were looking for me several Indians came to me and asked for ammunition with which to kill them. I told them they must not hurt the children--that if they did I would kill the first one that made the attempt to injure them. By this act I was able to save the boys.
It is all false that has been told about little girls being dressed in white and sent out to me. There never was anything of the kind done.
I staid [sic] on the west side of the valley for about two hours, looking down into the emigrant camp, and feeling all the torture of mind that it is possible for a man to suffer who feels merciful, and yet knows, as I then knew, what was in store for that unfortunate company if the Indians were successful in their bloody designs.
While I was standing on the hill looking down into the corral, I saw two men leave the corral and go outside to cut some wood; the Indians and whites kept up a steady fire on them all the time, but they paid no attention to danger, and kept right along at their work until they had it done, and then they went back into camp. The men all acted so bravely that it was impossible to keep from respecting them.
After staying there and looking down into the camp until I was nearly dead from grief, I returned to the company at camp. I was worn out with trouble and grief; I was nearly wild waiting for word from the authorities at Cedar City. I prayed for

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word to come that would enable me to save that band of suffering people, but no such word came. It never was to come.
On Thursday evening, John M. Higbee, Major of the Iron Militia, and Philip K. Smith, as he is called generally, but whose name is Klingensmith, Bishop of Cedar City, came to our camp with two or three wagons, and a number of men all well armed. I can remember the following as a portion of the men who came to take part in the work of death which was so soon to follow, viz.: John M. Higbee, Major and commander of the Iron Militia, and also first counselor to Isaac C. Haight; Philip Klingensmith, Bishop of Cedar City; Ira Allen, of the High Council; Robert Wiley, of the High Council; Richard Harrison, of Pinto, also a member of the High Council; Samuel McMurdy, one of the Counselors of Klingensmith; Charles Hopkins, of the City Council of Cedar City; Samuel Pollock; Daniel McFarland, a son-in-law of Isaac C. Haight, and acting as Adjutant under Major Higbee; John Ure, of the City Council; George Hunter, of the City Council; and I honestly believe that John McFarland, now an attorney-at-law at St. George, Utah, was there--I am not positive that he was, but my best impression is that he was there: Samuel Jukes; Nephi Johnson, with a number of Indians under his command; Irvin Jacobs; John Jacobs; E. Curtis, a Captain of Ten; Thomas Cartwright of the City Council and High Council; William Bateman, who afterwards carried the flag of truce to the emigrant camp; Anthony Stratton; A. Loveridge; Joseph Clews; Jabez Durfey; Columbus Freeman, and some others whose names I cannot remember. I know that our total force was fifty-four whites and over three hundred Indians.
As soon as these persons gathered around the camp, I demanded of Major Higbee what orders he had brought. I then stated fully all that had happened at the Meadows, so that every person might understand the situation.
Major Higbee reported as follows: "It is the orders of the President, that all the emigrants must be put out of the way. President Haight has counseled with Colonel Dame, or has had orders from him to put all of the emigrants out of the way; none who are old enough to talk are to be spared."
He then went on and said substantially that the emigrants had come through the country as our enemies, and as the enemies of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. That they

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had no pass from any one in authority to permit them to leave the Territory. That none but friends were permitted to leave the Territory, and that as these were our sworn enemies, they must be killed. That they were nothing but a portion of Johnston's army. That if they were allowed to go on to California, they would raise the war cloud in the West, and bring certain destruction upon all the settlements in Utah. That the only safety for the people was in the utter destruction of the whole rascally lot.
I then told them that God would have to change my heart before I could consent to such a wicked thing as the wholesale killing of that people. I attempted to reason with Higbee and the brethren. I told them how strongly the emigrants were fortified, and how wicked it was to kill the women and children. I was ordered to be silent. Higbee said I was resisting authority.
He then said, "Brother Lee is afraid of shedding innocent blood. Why, brethren, there is not a drop of innocent blood in that entire camp of Gentile outlaws; they are set of cut-throats, robbers and assassins; they are a part of the people who drove the Saints from Missouri, and who aided to shed the blood of our Prophets, Joseph and Hyrum, and it is our orders from all in authority, to get the emigrants from their stronghold, and help the Indians kill them."
I then said that Joseph Smith had told us never to betray any one. That we could not get the emigrants out of their corral unless we used treachery, and I was opposed to that.
I was interrupted by Higbee, Klingensmith and Hopkins, who said it was the orders of President Isaac C. Haight to us, and that Haight had his orders from Colonel Dame and the authorities at Parowan, and that all in authority were of one mind, and that they had been sent by the Council at Cedar City to the Meadows to counsel and direct the way and manner that the company of emigrants should be disposed of.
The men then in council, I must here state, now knelt down in a prayer circle and prayed, invoking the Spirit of God to direct them how to act in the matter.
After prayer, Major Higbee said, "Here are the orders," and handed me a paper from Haight. It was in substance that it was the orders of Haight to decoy the emigrants from their position, and kill all of them that could talk. This order was in

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writing. Higbee handed it to me and I read it, and dropped it on the ground, saying,
"I cannot do this."
The substance of the orders were that the emigrants should be decoyed from their strong-hold, and all exterminated, so that no one would be left to tell the tale, and then the authorities could say it was done by the Indians.
The words decoy and exterminate were used in that message or order, and these orders came to us as the orders from the Council at Cedar City, and as the orders of our military superior, that we were bound to obey. The order was signed by Haight, as commander of the troops at Cedar City.
Haight told me the next day after the massacre, while on the Meadows, that he got his orders from Colonel Dame.
I then left the Council, and went away to myself, and bowed myself in prayer before God, and asked Him to overrule the decision of that Council. I shed many bitter tears, and my tortured soul was wrung nearly from the body by my great suffering. I will here say, calling upon Heaven, angels, and the spirits of just men to witness what I say, that if I could then have had a thousand worlds to command, I would have given them freely to save that company from death.
While in bitter anguish, lamenting the sad condition of myself and others, Charles Hopkins, a man that I had great confidence in, came to me from the Council, and tried to comfort me by saying that he believed it was all right, for the brethren in the Priesthood were all united in the thing, and it would not be well for me to oppose them.
I told him the Lord must change my heart before I could ever do such an act willingly. I will further state that there was a reign of terror in Utah, at that time, and many a man had been put out of the way, on short notice, for disobedience, and I had made some narrow escapes.
At the earnest solicitation of Brother Hopkins, I returned with him to the Council. When I got back, the Council again prayed for aid. The Council was called The City Counselors, the Church or High Counselors; and all in authority, together with the private citizens, then formed a circle, and kneeling down, so that elbows would touch each other, several of the brethren prayed for Divine instructions.
After prayer, Major Higbee said, "I have the evidence of God's

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approval of our mission. It is God's will that we carry out our instructions to the letter."
I said, "My God! this is more than I can do. I must and do refuse to take part in this matter."
Higbee then said to me, "Brother Lee, I am ordered by President Haight to inform you that you shall receive a crown of Celestial glory for your faithfulness, and your eternal joy shall be complete." I was much shaken by this offer, for I had full faith in the power of the Priesthood to bestow such rewards and blessings, but I was anxious to save the people. I then proposed that we give the Indians all of the stock of the emigrants, except sufficient to haul their wagons, and let them go. To this proposition all the leading men objected. No man there raised his voice or hand to favor the saving of life, except myself.
The meeting was then addressed by some one in authority, I do not remember who it was. He spoke in about this language: "Brethren, we have been sent here to perform a duty. It is a duty that we owe to God, and to our Church and people. The orders of those in authority are that all the emigrants must die. Our leaders speak with inspired tongues, and their orders come from the God of Heaven. We have no right to question what they have commanded us to do; it is our duty to obey. If we wished to act as some of our weak-kneed brethren desire us to do, it would be impossible; the thing has gone too far to allow us to stop now. The emigrants know that we have aided the Indians, and if we let them go they will bring certain destruction upon us. It is a fact that on Wednesday night, two of the emigrants got out of camp and started back to Cedar City for assistance to withstand the Indian attacks; they had reached Richards' Springs when they met William C. Stewart, Joel White and Benjamin Arthur, three of our brethren from Cedar City. The men stated their business to the brethren, and as their horses were drinking at the Spring, Brother Stewart, feeling unusually full of zeal for the glory of God and the upbuilding of the Kingdom of God on earth, shot and killed one of the emigrants, a young man by the name of Aden. When Aden fell from his horse, Joel White shot and wounded the other Gentile; but he unfortunately got away, and returned to his camp and reported that the Mormons were helping the Indians in all that they were doing against the emigrants. Now the emigrants will report these facts in California if we let them go. We must kill them

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all, and our orders are to get them out by treachery if no other thing can be done to get them into our power."
Many of the brethren spoke in the same way, all arguing that the orders must be carried out.
I was then told the plan of action had been agreed upon, and it was this: The emigrants were to be decoyed from their strong-hold under a promise of protection. Brother William Bateman was to carry a flag of truce and demand a parley, and then I was to go and arrange the terms of the surrender. I was to demand that all the children who were so young they could not talk should be put into a wagon, and the wounded were also to be put into a wagon. Then all the arms and ammunition of the emigrants should be put into a wagon, and I was to agree that the Mormons would protect the emigrants from the Indians and conduct them to Cedar City in safety, where they should be protected until an opportunity came for sending them to California.
It was agreed that when I had made the full agreement and treaty, as the brethren called it, the wagons should start for Hamblin's Ranch with the arms, the wounded and the children. The women were to march on foot and follow the wagons in single file; the men were to follow behind the women, they also to march in single file. Major John M. Higbee was to stand with his militia company about two hundred yards from the camp, and stand in double file, open order, with about twenty feet space between the files, so that the wagons could pass between them. The drivers were to keep right along, and not stop at the troops. The women were not to stop there, but to follow the wagons. The troops were to halt the men for a few minutes, until the women were some distance ahead, out into the cedars, where the Indians were hid in ambush. Then the march was to be resumed, the troops to form in single file, each soldier to walk by an emigrant, and on the right-hand side of his man, and the soldier was to carry his gun on his left arm, ready for instant use. The march was to continue until the wagons had passed beyond the ambush of the Indians, and until the women were right in the midst of the Indians. Higbee was then to give the orders and words, "Do Your Duty." At this the troops were to shoot down the men; the Indians were to kill all of the women and larger children, and the drivers of the wagons and I were to kill the wounded and sick men that were in the wagons. Two

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men were to be placed on horses nearby, to overtake and kill any of the emigrants that might escape from the first assault. The Indians were to kill the women and large children, so that it would be certain that no Mormon would be guilty of shedding innocent blood--if it should happen that there was any innocent blood in the company that were to die. Our leading men said that there was no innocent blood in the whole company.
The Council broke up a little after daylight on Friday morning. All the horses, except two for the men to ride to overtake those who might escape, and one for Dan McFarland to ride as Adjutant, so that he could carry orders from one part of the field to another, were turned out on the range. Then breakfast was eaten, and the brethren prepared for the work in hand.
I was now satisfied that it was the wish of all of the Mormon priesthood to have the thing done. One reason for thinking so was that it was in keeping with the teachings of the leaders, and as Utah was then at war with the United States we believed all the Gentiles were to be killed as a war measure, and that the Mormons, as God's chosen people, were to hold and inhabit the earth and rule and govern the globe. Another, and one of my strongest reasons for believing that the leaders wished the thing done, was on account of the talk that I had with George A. Smith, which I have given in full in this statement. I was satisfied that Smith had passed the emigrants while on his way from Salt Lake City, and I then knew this was the train that he meant when he spoke of a train that would make threats and illtreat our people, etc.
The people were in the full blaze of the reformation and anxious to do some act that would add to their reputation as zealous Churchmen.
I therefore, taking all things into consideration, and believing, as I then did, that my superiors were inspired men, who could not go wrong in any matter relating to the Church or the duty of its members, concluded to be obedient to the wishes of those in authority. I took up my cross and prepared to do my duty.
Soon after breakfast Major Higbee ordered the two Indian interpreters, Carl Shirts and Nephi Johnson, to inform the Indians of the plan of operations, and to place the Indians in ambush, so that they could not be seen by the emigrants until the work of death should commence.
This was done in order to make the emigrants believe that we

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had sent the Indians away, and that we were acting honestly and in good faith, when we agreed to protect them from the savages.
The orders were obeyed, and in five minutes not an Indian could be seen on the. whole Meadows. They secreted themselves and lay still as logs of wood, until the order was given for them to rush out and kill the women.
Major Higbee then called all the people to order, and directed me to explain the whole plan to them. I did so, explaining just how every person was expected to act during the whole performance.
Major Higbee then gave the order for his men to advance. They marched to the spot agreed upon, and halted there. William Bateman was then selected to carry a flag of truce to the emigrants and demand their surrender, and I was ordered to go and make the treaty after some one had replied to our flag of truce. (The emigrants had kept a white flag flying in their camp ever since they saw me cross the valley.)
Bateman took a white flag and started for the emigrant camp. When he got about half way to the corral, he was met by one of the emigrants, that I afterwards learned was named Hamilton. They talked some time, but I never knew what was said between them.
Brother Bateman returned to the command and said that the emigrants would accept our terms, and surrender as we required them to do.
I was then ordered by Major Higbee to go to the corral and negotiate the treaty, and superintend the whole matter. I was again ordered to be certain and get all the arms and ammunition into the wagons. Also to put the children and the sick and wounded in the wagons, as had been agreed upon in council. Then Major Higbee said to me:
"Brother Lee, we expect you to faithfully carry out all the instructions that have been given you by our council."
Samuel McMurdy and Samuel Knight were then ordered to drive their teams and follow me to the corral to haul off the children, arms, etc.
The troops formed in two lines, as had been agreed upon, and were standing in that way with arms at rest, when I left them.
I walked ahead of the wagons up to the corral. When I reached there I met Mr. Hamilton on the outside of the camp.

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He loosened the chains from some of their wagons, and moved one wagon out of the way, so that our teams could drive inside of the corral and into their camp. It was then noon, or a little after.
I found that the emigrants were strongly fortified; their wagons were chained to each other in a circle. In the centre [sic] was a rifle-pit, large enough to contain the entire company. This had served to shield them from the constant fire of their enemy, which had been poured into them from both sides of the valley, from a rocky range that served as a breastwork for their assailants. The valley at this point was not more than five hundred yards wide, and the emigrants had their camp near the center of the valley. On the east and west there was a low range of rugged, rocky mountains, affording a splendid place for the protection of the Indians and Mormons, and leaving them in comparative safety while they fired upon the emigrants. The valley at this place runs nearly due north and south.
When I entered the corral, I found the emigrants engaged in burying two men of note among them, who had died but a short time before from the effect of wounds received by them from the Indians at the time of the first attack on Tuesday morning. They wrapped the bodies up in buffalo robes, and buried them in a grave inside the corral. I was then told by some of the men that seven men were killed and seventeen others were wounded at the first attack made by the Indians, and that three of the wounded men had since died, making ten of their number killed during the siege.
As I entered the fortifications, men, women and children gathered around me in wild consternation. Some felt that the time of their happy deliverance had come, while others, though in deep distress, and all in tears, looked upon me with doubt, distrust and terror. My feelings at this time may be imagined (but I doubt the power of man being equal to even imagine how wretched I felt.) No language can describe my feelings. My position was painful, trying and awful; my brain seemed to be on fire; my nerves were for a moment unstrung; humanity was overpowered, as I thought of the cruel, unmanly part that I was acting. Tears of bitter anguish fell in streams from my eyes; my tongue refused its office; my faculties were dormant, stupefied and deadened by grief. I wished that the earth would open and swallow me where I stood. God knows my suffering

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was great. I cannot describe my feelings. I knew that I was acting a cruel part and doing a damnable deed. Yet my faith in the godliness of my leaders was such that it forced me to think that I was not sufficiently spiritual to act the important part I was commanded to perform. My hesitation was only momentary. Then feeling that duty compelled obedience to orders, I laid aside my weakness and my humanity, and became an instrument in the hands of my superiors and my leaders. I delivered my message and told the people that they must put their arms in the wagon, so as not to arouse the animosity of the Indians. I ordered the children and wounded, some clothing and the arms, to be put into the wagons. Their guns were mostly Kentucky rifles of the muzzle-loading style. Their ammunition was about all gone--I do not think there were twenty loads left in their whole camp. If the emigrants had had a good supply of ammunition they never would have surrendered, and I do not think we could have captured them without great loss, for they were brave men and very resolute and determined.
Just as the wagons were loaded, Dan McFarland came riding into the corral and said that Major Higbee had ordered great haste to be made, for he was afraid that the Indians would return and renew the attack before he could get the emigrants to a place of safety.
I hurried up the people and started the wagons off towards Cedar City. As we went out of the corral I ordered the wagons to turn to the left, so as to leave the troops to the right of us. Dan McFarland rode before the women and led them right up to the troops, where they still stood in open order as I left them. The women and larger children were walking ahead, as directed, and the men following them. The foremost man was about fifty yards behind the hindmost woman.
The women and children were hurried right on by the troops. When the men came up they cheered the soldiers as if they believed that they were acting honestly. Higbee then gave the orders for his men to form in single file and take their places as ordered before, that is, at the right of the emigrants.
I saw this much, but about this time our wagons passed out of sight of the troops, over the hill. I had disobeyed orders in part by turning off as I did, for I was anxious to be out of sight of the bloody deed that I knew was to follow. I knew that I

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had much to do yet that was of a cruel and unnatural character. It was my duty, with the two drivers, to kill the sick and wounded who were in the wagons, and to do so when we heard the guns of the troops fire. I was walking between the wagons; the horses were going in a fast walk, and we were fully half a mile from Major Higbee and his men, when we heard the firing. As we heard the guns, I ordered a halt and we proceeded to do our part.
I here pause in the recital of this horrid story of man's inhumanity, and ask myself the question, Is it honest in me, and can I clear my conscience before my God, if I screen myself while I accuse others? No, never! Heaven forbid that I should put a burden upon others' shoulders, that I am unwilling to bear my just portion of. I am not a traitor to my people, nor to my former friends and comrades who were with me on that dark day when the work of death was carried on in God's name, by a lot of deluded and religious fanatics. It is my duty to tell facts as they exist, and I will do so.
I have said that all of the small children were put into the wagons; that was wrong, for one little child, about six months old, was carried in its father's arms, and it was killed by the same bullet that entered its father's breast; it was shot through the head. I was told by Haight afterwards, that the child was killed by accident, but I cannot say whether that is a fact or not. I saw it lying dead when I returned to the place of slaughter.
When we had got out of sight, as I said before, and just as we were coming into the main road, I heard a volley of guns at the place where I knew the troops and emigrants were. Our teams were then going at a fast walk. I first heard one gun, then a volley at once followed.
McMurdy and Knight stopped their teams at once, for they were ordered by Higbee, the same as I was, to help kill all the sick and wounded who were in the wagons, and to do it as soon as they heard the guns of the troops. McMurdy was in front; his wagon was mostly loaded with the arms and small children. McMurdy and Knight got out of their wagons; each one had a rifle. McMurdy went up to Knight's wagon, where the sick and wounded were, and raising his rifle to his shoulder, said: "0 Lord, my God, receive their spirits, it is for thy Kingdom that I do this." He then shot a man who was lying with his head on another man's breast; the ball killed both men.

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I also went up to the wagon, intending to do my part of the killing. I drew my pistol and cocked it, but somehow it went off prematurely, and I shot McMurdy across the thigh, my Pistol ball cutting his buck-skin pants. McMurdy turned to me and said:
"Brother Lee, keep cool, you are excited; you came very near killing me. Keep cool, there is no reason for being excited."
Knight then shot a man with his rifle; he shot the man in the head. Knight also brained a boy that was about fourteen years old. The boy came running up to our wagons, and Knight struck him on the head with the butt end of his gun, and crushed his skull. By this time many Indians reached our wagons, and all of the sick and wounded were killed almost instantly. I saw an Indian from Cedar City, called Joe, run up to the wagon and catch a man by the hair, and raise his head up and look into his face; the man shut his eyes, and Joe shot him in the head. The Indians then examined all of the wounded in the wagons, and all of the bodies, to see if any were alive, and all that showed signs of life were at once shot through the head. I did not kill any one there, but it was an accident that kept me from it, for I fully intended to do my part of the killing, but by the time I got over the excitement of coming so near killing McMurdy, the whole of the killing of the wounded was done. There is no truth in the statement of Nephi Johnson, where he says I cut a man's throat.
Just after the wounded were all killed I saw a girl, some ten or eleven years old, running towards us, from the direction where the troops had attacked the main body of emigrants; she was covered with blood. An Indian shot her before she got within sixty yards of us. That was the last person that I saw killed on that occasion.
About this time an Indian rushed to the front wagon, and grabbed a little boy, and was going to kill him. The lad got away from the Indian and ran to me, and caught me by the knees; and begged me to save him, and not let the Indian kill him. The Indian had hurt the little fellow's chin on the wagon bed, when he first caught hold of him. I told the Indian to let the boy alone. I took the child up in my arms, and put him back in the wagon, and saved his life. This little boy said his name was Charley Fancher, and that his father was Captain of

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the train. He was a bright boy. I afterwards adopted him, and gave him to Caroline. She kept him until Dr. Forney took all the children East. I believe that William Sloan, alias Idaho Bill, is the same boy.
After all the parties were dead, I ordered Knight to drive out on one side, and throw out the dead bodies. He did so, and threw them out of his wagon at a place about one hundred yards from the road, and then came back to where I was standing. I then ordered Knight and McMurdy to take the children that were saved alive, (sixteen was the number, some say seventeen, I say sixteen,) and drive on to Hamblin's ranch. They did as I ordered them to do. Before the wagons started, Nephi Johnson came up in company with the Indians that were under his command, and Carl Shirts I think came up too, but I know that I then considered that Carl Shirts was a coward, and I afterwards made him suffer for being a coward. Several white men came up too, but I cannot tell their names, as I have forgotten who they were.
Knight lied when he said I went to the ranch and ordered him to go to the field with his team. I never knew anything of his team, or heard of it, until he came with a load of armed men in his wagon, on the evening of Thursday. If any one ordered him to go to the Meadows, it was Higbee. Every witness that claims that he went to the Meadows without knowing what he was going to do, has lied, for they all knew, as well as Haight or any one else did, and they all voted, every man of them, in the Council, on Friday morning, a little before daylight, to kill all the emigrants.
After the wagons, with the children, had started for Hamblin's ranch, I turned and walked back to where the brethren were. Nephi Johnson lies when he says he was on horse-back, and met me, or that I gave him orders to go to guard the wagons. He is a perjured wretch, and has sworn to every thing he could to injure me. God knows what I did do was bad enough, but he has lied to suit the leaders of the Church, who want me out of the way.
While going back, to the brethren, I passed the bodies of several women. In one place I saw six or seven bodies near each other; they were stripped perfectly naked, and all of their clothing was torn from their bodies by the Indians.
I walked along the line where the emigrants had been killed,

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and saw many bodies lying dead and naked on the field, near by where the women lay. I saw ten children; they had been killed close to each other; they were from ten to sixteen years of age. The bodies of the women and children were scattered along the ground for quite a distance before I came to where the men were killed.
I do not know how many were killed, but I thought then that there were some fifteen women, about ten children, and about forty men killed, but the statement of others that I have since talked with about the massacre, makes me think there were fully one hundred and ten killed that day on the Mountain Meadows, and the ten who had died in the corral, and young Aden killed by Stewart at Richards' Springs, would make the total number one hundred and twenty-one.
When I reached the place where the dead men lay, I was told how the orders had been obeyed. Major Higbee said, "The boys have acted admirably, they took good aim, and all of the d--d Gentiles but two or three fell at the first fire."
He said that three or four got away some distance, but the men on horses soon overtook them and cut their throats. Higbee said the Indians did their part of the work well, that it did not take over a minute to finish up when they got fairly started. I found that the first orders had been carried out to the letter.
Three of the emigrants did get away, but the Indians were put on their trail and they overtook and killed them before they reached the settlements in California. But it would take more time than I have to spare to give the details of their chase and capture. I may do so in my writings hereafter, but not now.
I found Major Higbee, Klingensmith. and most of the brethren standing near by where the largest number of the dead men lay. When I went up to the brethren, Major Higbee said,
"We must now examine the bodies for valuables."
I said I did not wish to do any such work.
Higbee then said, "Well, you hold my hat and I will examine the bodies, and put what valuables I get into the hat."
The bodies were all searched by Higbee, Klingensmith and Wm. C. Stewart. I did hold the hat a while, but I soon got so sick that I had to give it to some other person, as I was unable to stand for a few minutes. The search resulted in getting a little money and a few watches, but there was not much money. Higbee and Klingensmith kept the property, I suppose, for I

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never knew what became of it, unless they did keep it. I think they kept it all.
After the dead were searched, as I have just said, the brethren were called up, and Higbee and Klingensmith, as well as myself, made speeches, and ordered the people to keep the matter ,a secret from the entire world. Not to tell their wives, or their most intimate friends, and we pledged ourselves to keep everything relating to the affair a secret during life. We also took the most binding oaths to stand by each other, and to always insist that the massacre was committed by Indians alone. This was the advice of Brigham Young too, as I will show hereafter.
The men were mostly ordered to camp there on the field for that night, but Higbee and Klingensmith went with me to Hamblin's ranch, where we got something to eat, and staid [sic] there all night. I was nearly dead for rest and sleep; in fact I had rested but little since the Saturday night before. I took my saddle-blanket and spread it on the ground soon after I had eaten my supper, and lay down on the saddle-blanket, using my saddle for a pillow, and slept soundly until next morning.
I was awakened in the morning by loud talking between Isaac C. Haight and William H. Dame. They were very much excited, and quarreling with each other. I got up at once, but was unable to hear what they were quarreling about, for they cooled down as soon as they saw that others were paying attention to them.
I soon learned that Col. Dame, Judge Lewis of Parowan, and Isaac C. Haight, with several others, had arrived at the Hamblin ranch in the night, but I do not know what time they got there.
After breakfast we all went back in a body to the Meadows, to bury the dead and take care of the property that was left there.
When we reached the Meadows we all rode up to that part of the field where the women were lying dead. The bodies of men, women and children had been stripped entirely naked, making the scene one of the most loathsome and ghastly that can be imagined.
Knowing that Dame and Haight had quarreled at Hamblin's that morning, I wanted to know how they would act in sight of the dead, who lay there as the result of their orders. I was

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greatly interested to know what Dame had to say, so I kept close to them, without appearing to be watching them.
Colonel Dame was silent for some time. He looked all over the field, and was quite pale, and looked uneasy and frightened. I thought then that he was just finding out the difference between giving and executing orders for wholesale killing. He spoke to Haight, and said:
"I must report this matter to the authorities."
"How will you report it?" said Haight.
Dame said, "I will report it just as it is."
"Yes, I suppose so, and implicate yourself with the rest?" said Haight.
"No," said Dame. "I will not implicate myself for I had nothing to do with it."
Haight then said, "That will not do, for you know a d--d sight better. You ordered it done. Nothing has been done except by your orders, and it is too late in the day for you to order things done and then go back on it, and go back on the men who have carried out your orders. You cannot sow pig on me, and I will be d--d if I will stand it. You are as much to blame as any one, and you know that we have done nothing except what you ordered done. I know that I have obeyed orders, and by G-d I will not be lied on."
Colonel Dame was much excited. He choked up, and would have gone away, but he knew Haight was a man of determination, and would not stand any foolishness.
As soon as Colonel Dame could collect himself, he said:
"I did not think there were so many of them, or I would not have had anything to do with it."
I thought it was now time for me to chip in, so I said:
"Brethren, what is the trouble between you? It will not do for our chief men to disagree."
Haight stepped up to my side, a little in front of me, and facing Colonel Dame. He was very mad, and said:
"The trouble is just this: Colonel Dame counseled and ordered me to do this thing, and now he wants to back out, and go back on me, and by G-d, he shall not do it. He shall not lay it all on me. He cannot do it. He must not try to do it. I will blow him to h--l before he shall lay it all on me. He has got to stand up to what he did, like a little man. He knows he ordered it, done, and I dare him to deny it."

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Colonel Dame was perfectly cowed. He did not offer to deny it again, but said:
"Isaac, I did not know there were so many of them."
"That makes no difference," said Haight, "you ordered me to do it, and you have got to stand up for your orders."
I thought it was now time to stop the fuss, for many of the young brethren were coming around. So I said:
"Brethren, this is no place to talk over such a matter. You will agree when you get where you can be quiet, and talk it over."
Haight said, "There is no more to say, for he knows he ordered it done, and he has got to stand by it."
That ended the trouble between them, and I never heard of Colonel Dame denying the giving of the orders any more, until after the Church authorities concluded to offer me up for the sins of the Church.
We then went along the field, and passed by where the brethren were at work covering up the bodies. They piled the dead bodies up in heaps, in little gullies, and threw dirt over them. The bodies were only lightly covered, for the ground was hard, and the brethren did not have sufficient tools to dig with. I suppose it is true that the first rain washed the bodies all out again, but I never went back to examine whether it did or not.
We then went along the field to where the corral and camp had been, to where the wagons were standing. We found that the Indians had carried off all of the wagon covers, and the clothing, and the provisions, and had emptied the feathers out of the feather-beds, and carried off all the ticks.
After the dead were covered up or buried (but it was not much of a burial,) the brethren were called together, and a council was held at the emigrant camp. All the leading men made speeches; Colonel Dame, President Haight. Klingensmith, John M. Higbee, Hopkins and myself. The speeches were first--Thanks to God for delivering our enemies into our hands; next, thanking the brethren for their zeal in God's cause; and then the necessity of always saying the Indians did it alone, and that the Mormons had nothing to do with it. The most of the speeches, however, were in the shape of exhortations and commands to keep the whole matter secret from every one but Brigham Young. It was voted unanimously that any man who should divulge the secret, or tell who was present, or do any-

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thing that would lead to a discovery of the truth, should suffer death.
The brethren then all took a most solemn oath, binding themselves under the most dreadful and awful penalties, to keep the whole matter secret from every human being, as long as they should live. No man was to know the facts. The brethren were sworn not to talk of it among themselves, and each one swore to help kill all who proved to be traitors to the Church or people in this matter.
It was then agreed that Brigham Young should be informed of the whole matter, by some one to be selected by the Church Council, after the brethren had returned home.
It was also voted to turn all the property over to Klingensmith, as Bishop of the Church at Cedar City, and he was to take care of the property for the benefit of the Church, until Brigham Young was notified, and should give further orders what to do with it.

Pages 249-292



COLONEL DAME then blest the brethren and we prepared to go to our homes. I took my little Indian boy, Clem, on the horse behind me, and started home. I crossed the mountains and returned the same way I had come.
When I got in about two miles of Harmony, I overtook a body of about forty Indians, on their way home from the massacre. They had a large amount of bloody clothing, and were driving several head of cattle that they had taken from the emigrants.
The Indians were very glad to see me, and said I was their Captain, and that they were going to Harmony with me as my men. It was the orders from the Church authorities to do everything we could to pacify the Indians, and make them the fast friends of the Mormons, so I concluded to humor them.
I started on and they marched after me until we reached the fort at Harmony. We went into the fort and marched round inside, after which they halted and gave their whoop of victory, which means much the same with them as the cheers do with the whites. I then ordered the Indians to be fed; my family gave them some bread and melons, which they eat [sic], and then they left me and went to their tribe.
I will here state again that on the field, before and after the massacre, and again at the council at the emigrant camp, the day after the massacre, orders were given to keep everything secret, and if any man told the secret to any human being, he was to be killed, and I assert as a fact that if any man had told it then, or for many years afterwards, he would have died, for some "Destroying Angel" would have followed his trail and sent him over the "rim of the basin."

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From that day to this it has been the understanding with all concerned in that massacre, that the man who divulged the secret should die; he was to be killed, wherever he was found, for treason to the men who killed the emigrants, and for his treason to the Church. No man was at liberty to tell his wife, or any one else, nor were the brethren permitted to talk of it even among themselves. Such were the orders and instructions, from Brigham Young down to the lowest in authority. The orders to lay it all to the Indians, were just as positive as they were to keep it all secret. This was the counsel from all in authority, and for years it was faithfully observed.
The children that were saved were taken to Cedar City, and other settlements, and put out among different families, where they were kept until they were given up to Dr. Forney, the Agent of the United States, who came for them.
I did not have anything to do with the property taken from the emigrants, or the cattle, or anything else, for some three months after the massacre, and then I only took charge of the cattle because I was ordered to do so by Brigham Young.
There were eighteen wagons in all at the emigrant camp. They were all wooden axles but one, and that was a light iron axle; it had been hauled by four mules. There were something over five hundred head of cattle, but I never got the half of them. The Indians killed a large number at the time of the massacre, and drove others to their tribes when they went home from Mountain Meadows. Kingensmith put the Church brand on fifty head or more, of the best of the cattle, and then he and Haight and Higbee drove the cattle to Salt Lake City and sold them for goods that they brought back to Cedar City to trade on.
The Indians got about twenty head of horses and mules. Samuel Knight, one of the witnesses on my trial, got a large sorrel mare; Haight got a span of average American mules; Joel White got a fine mare; Higbee got a good large mule; Klingensmith got a span of mules. Haight, Higbee and Allen each took a wagon. The people all took what they wanted, and they had divided and used up much over half of it before I was put in charge.

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The first time I heard that a messenger had been sent to Brigham Young for instructions as to what should be done with the emigrants, was three or four days after I had returned home from the Meadows. Then I heard of it from Isaac C. Haight, when he came to my house and had a talk with me. He said:
"We are all in a muddle. Haslem has returned from Salt Lake City, with orders from Brigham Young to let the emigrants pass in safety."
In this conversation Haight also said:
"I sent an order to Highee to save the emigrants, after I had sent the orders for killing them all, but for some reason the message did not reach him. I understand the messenger did not go to the Meadows at all."
I at once saw that we were in a bad fix, and I asked Haight what was to be done. We talked the matter over again.
Haight then told me that it was the orders of the Council that I should go to Salt Lake City and lay the whole matter before Brigham Young. I asked him if he was not going to write a report of it to the Governor, as he was the right man to do it, for he was in command of the militia in that section of country, and next to Dame in command of the whole district. I told him that it was a matter which really belonged to the military department, and should be so reported.
He refused to write a report, saying:
"You can report it better than I could write it. You are like a ember of Brigham's family, and can talk to him privately and confidentially. I want you to take all of it on yourself that ou can, and not expose any more of the brethren than you find absolutely necessary. Do this, Brother Lee, as I order you to do, and you shall receive a celestial reward for it, and the time will come when all who acted with us will be glad for the part they have taken, for the time is near at hand when the Saints are to enjoy the riches of the earth. And all who deny the faith and doctrines of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints shall be slain--the sword of vengeance shall shed their blood; their wealth shall be given as a spoil to our people."
At that time I believed everything he said, and I fully expected to receive the celestial reward that he promised me. But now I say, Damn all such "celestial rewards" as I am to get for what I did on that fatal day.
It was then preached every Sunday to the people that the Mormons were to conquer the earth at once, and the people all thought that the millennium had come, and that Christ's reign upon earth would soon begin, as an accomplished fact.

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According to the orders of Isaac C. Haight, I started for Salt Lake City to report the whole facts connected with the massacre, to Brigham Young. I started about a week or ten days after the massacre, and I was on the way about ten days. When I arrived in the city I went to the President's house and gave to Brigham Young a full, detailed statement of the whole affair, from first to last--only I took rather more on myself than I had done.
He asked me if I had brought a letter from Haight, with his report of the affair. I said:
"'No, Haight wished me to make a verbal report of it, as I was an eye witness to much of it."
I then went over the whole affair and gave him as full a statement as it was possible for me to give. I described everything about it. I told him of the orders Haight first gave me. I told him everything. I told him that "Brother McMurdy, Brother Knight and myself killed the wounded men in the wagons, with the assistance of the Indians. We killed six wounded men."
He asked me many questions, and I told him every particular, and everything that I knew. I described everything very fully. I told him what I had said against killing the women and children.
Brigham then said:
"Isaac (referring to Haight) has sent me word that if they had killed every man, woman and child in the outfit, there would not have been a drop of innocent blood shed by the brethren: for they were a set of murderers, robbers and thieves."
While I was still talking with him, some men came into his house to see him, so he requested me to keep quiet until they left. I did as he directed.
As soon as the men went out, I continued my recital. I gave him the names of every man that had been present at the massacre. I told him who killed various ones. In fact I gave him all the information there was to give.
When I finished talking about the matter, he said:
"This is the most unfortunate affair that ever befel [sic] the Church. I am afraid of treachery among the brethren that were there. If any one tells this thing so that it will become public, it will work us great injury. I want you to understand now, that you are never to tell this again, not even to Heber C. Kimball. It must be kept a secret among ourselves. When you get home, I

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want you to sit down and write a long letter, and give me an account of the affair, charging it to the Indians. You sign the letter as Farmer to the Indians, and direct it to me as Indian Agent. I can then make use of such a letter to keep off all damaging and troublesome enquiries."
I told him that I would write the letter. (I kept my word; but, as an evidence of his treachery, that same letter that he ordered me to write, he has given to Attorney Howard, and he has introduced it in evidence against me on my trial.)
Brigham Young knew when he got that letter just as well as I did, that it was not a true letter, and that it was only written according to his orders to throw the public off of the right trail. He knew that it was written simply to cast all the blame on the Indians, and to protect the brethren. In writing that letter I was still obeying my orders and earning that Celestial reward that had been promised to me.
He then said, "If only men had been killed, I would not have cared so much; but the killing of the women and children is the sin of it. I suppose the men were a hard set, but it is hard to kill women and children for the sins of the men. This whole thing stands before me like a horrid vision. I must have time to reflect upon it."
He then told me to withdraw and call next day, and he would give me an answer. I said to him,
"President Young, the people all felt, and I know that I believed I was obeying orders, and acting for the good of the Church, and in strict conformity with the oaths that we have all taken to avenge the blood of the Prophets. You must either sustain the people for what they have done, or you most release us from the oaths and obligations that we have taken."
The only reply he made was,
"Go now, and come in the morning, and I will give you an answer."
I went to see him again in the morning. When I went in, he he [sic] seemed quite cheerful. He said,
"I have made that matter a subject of prayer. I went right to God with it, and asked Him to take the horrid vision from my sight, if it was a righteous thing that my people had done in killing those people at the Mountain Meadows. God answered me, and at once the vision was removed. I have evidence from

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God that He has overruled it all for good, and the action was a righteous one and well intended.
["]The brethren acted from pure motives. The only trouble is they acted a little prematurely; they were a little ahead of time. I sustain you and all of the brethren for what they did. All that I fear is treachery on the part of some one who took a with you, but we will look to that."
I was again cautioned and commanded to keep the whole thing as a sacred secret, and again told to write the report as Indian Farmer, laying the blame on the Indians. That ended our interview, and I left him, and soon started for my home at Harmony.
Brigham Young was then satisfied with the purity of my motives in acting as I had done at the Mountain Meadows. Now he is doing all he can against me, but I know it is nothing but cowardice that has made him turn against me as he has at last.
When I reported my interview with Young to Haight, and gave him Brigham's answer, he was well pleased; he said that I had done well. He again enjoined secrecy, and said it must never be told.
I remember a circumstance that Haight then related to me about Dan. [sic] McFarland. He said:
"Dan will make a bully warrior."
I said, "Why do you think so?"
"Well," said he, "Dan came to me and said, 'You must get me another knife, because the one I have got has no good stuff in it, for the edge turned when I cut a fellow's throat that day at the Meadows. I caught one of the devils that was trying to get away, and when I cut his throat it took all the edge off of my knife.' I tell you that boy will make a bully warrior."
I said, "Haight, I don't believe you have any conscience."
He laughed, and said, "Conscience be d--d, I don't know what the word means."
I thought over the matter, and made up my mind to write the letter to Brigham Young and lay it all to the Indians, so as to get the matter off of my mind. I then wrote the letter that has been used in the trial. It was as follows:

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November 20th, 1857.
To His Excellency, Gov. B. Young, Ex-Officio and Superintendent
of Indian Affairs:
DEAR SIR: My report under date May 11th, 1857, relative to the Indians over whom I have charge as farmer, showed a friendly relation between them and the whites, which doubtless would have continued to increase had not the white mans been the first aggressor, as was the case with Capt. Fancher's company of emigrants, passing through to California about the middle of September last, on Corn Creek, fifteen miles south of Fillmore City, Millard County. The company there poisoned the meat of an ox, which they gave the Pah Vant Indians to eat, causing four of them to die immediately, besides poisoning a number more. The company also poisoned the water where they encamped, killing the cattle of the settlers. This unguided policy, planned in wickedness by this company, raised the ire of the Indians, which soon spread through the southern tribes, firing them up with revenge till blood was in their path, and as the breach, according to their tradition, was a national one, consequently any portion of the nation was liable to atone for that offense.
About the 22d of September, Capt. Fancher and company fell victims to their wrath, near Mountain Meadows; their cattle and horses were shot down in every direction, their wagons and property mostly committed to the flames. Had they been the only ones that suffered we would have less cause of complaint. But the following company of near the same size had many of their men shot down near Beaver City, and had it not been for the interposition of the citizens at that place, the whole company would have been massacred by the enraged Pah Vants. From this place they were protected by military force, by order of Col. W. H. Dame, through the Territory, beside. providing the company with interpreters, to help them through to the Los Vaagus. On the Muddy, some three to five hundred Indians attacked the company, while traveling, and drove off several hundred head of cattle, telling the company that if they fired a single gun that they would kill every soul. The interpreters tried to regain the stock, or a portion of them, by presents, but in vain. The Indians told them to mind their own business, or

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their lives would not be safe. Since that occurrence no company has been able to pass without some of our interpreters to talk and explain matters to the Indians.
Friendly feelings yet remain between the natives and settlers and I have no hesitancy in saying that it will increase so long as we treat them kindly, and deal honestly toward them. I have been blest in my labors the last year. Much grain has been raised for the Indians.
I herewith furnish you the account of W. H. Dame, of Parowan, for cattle, wagons, etc.

From the above report you will see that the wants of the Natives have increased commensurate with their experience and practice in the art of agriculture.
With sentiments of high consideration,
I am your humble servant,
Farmer to Pah Utes Indians.
Gov. B. Young, Ex-officio and Superintendent of Indian affairs.

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I forwarded that letter, and thought I had managed the affair nicely.
I put in the expense account of $2,220, just to show off, and help Brigham Young to get something from the Government. It was the way his Indian farmers all did. I never gave the Indians one of the articles named in the letter. No one of the men mentioned had ever furnished such articles to the Indians, but I did it this way for safety. Brigham Young never spent a dollar on the Indians in Utah, while he was Indian Agent. The only money he ever spent on the Indians was when we were at war with them. Then they cost us some money, but not much.
Brigham Young, well knowing that I wrote that letter just for the protection of the brethren, used it to make up his report to the Government about his acts as Indian Agent. I obeyed his orders in this, as I did the orders of Haight at the Mountain Meadows, and I am now getting my pay for my falsehood. I acted conscientiously in the whole matter, and have nothing to blame myself for, except being so silly as to allow myself to be duped by the cowardly wretches who are now seeking safety by hunting me to the death.
The following winter I was a delegate to the Constitutional Convention, that met in Salt Lake City to form a constitution, preparatory to the application of Utah for admission into the Union. I attended during the entire session, and was often in company with Brigham Young at his house and elsewhere, and he treated me all the time with great kindness and consideration.
At the close of the session of the Convention, I was directed by Brigham Young to take charge of all the cattle, and other property taken from the emigrants, and take care of it for the Indians. I did as I was ordered. When I got home I gathered up about two hundred head of cattle, and put my brand on them, and I gave them to the Indians, as they needed them, or rather when they demanded them. I did that until all of the emigrant cattle were gone.
This thing of taking care of that property was an unfortunate thing for me, for when the Indians wanted beef, they thought they owned everything with my brand on it. So much so, that I long since quit branding my stock. I preferred taking chances of leaving them unbranded, for every thing with my brand on was certain to be taken by the Indians. I know that

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it has been reported that the emigrants were very rich. That is a mistake. Their only wealth consisted in cattle and their teams. The people were comfortably dressed in Kentucky jean, and lindsey, but they had no fine clothing that I ever saw.
They had but few watches. I never owned or carried one of the watches taken from the emigrants in my life, or had anything to do with any of their property, except to take care or the cattle for the Indians, as ordered to do by Brigham Young, as I have before stated in this confession.
There is another falsehood generally believed in Utah, especially among the Mormons. It is this. It has generally been reported that Brigham Young was anxious to help Judge Cradlebaugh arrest all the guilty parties. There is not one word of truth in the whole statement. Brigham Young knew the name of every man that was in any way implicated in the Mountain Meadows Massacre. He knew just as much about it as I did, except that he did not see it, as I had seen it.
If Brigham Young had wanted one man, or fifty men, or five hundred men arrested, all he would have had to do would have been to say so, and they would have been arrested instantly. There was no escape for them if he ordered their arrest. Every man who knows anything of affairs in Utah at that time knows this is so.
It is true that Brigham made a great parade at the time, and talked a great deal about bringing the guilty parties to Justice, but he did not mean a word of it--not a word. He did go South with Cradlebaugh, but he took good care that Cradlebaugh caught no person that had been in the massacre.
I know that I had plenty of notice of their coming, and so did all the brethren. It was one of Brigham Young's cunning dodges to blind the government. That this is true I can prove by the statement of what he did at Cedar City while out on his trip with Judge Cradlebaugh to investigate the matter and arrest (?) the guilty parties.
Judge Cradelbaugh [sic] and his men were working like faithful men to find out all about it, but they did not learn very much. True, they got on the right track, but could not learn it all, for Brigham Young was along to see that they did not learn the facts.
While at Cedar City, Brigham preached one night, but none of the Judge's party heard him. In his sermon, when speaking of the Mountain Meadows Massacre, he said:

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"Do you know who those people were that were killed at the Mountain Meadows? I will tell you who those people were. They were fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, cousins and children of those who killed the Saints, and drove them from Missouri, and afterwards killed our Prophets in Carthage jail. These children that the government has made such a stir about, were gathered up by the goverment [sic] and carried back to Missouri, to St. Louis, and letters were sent to their relatives to come and take them; but their relations wrote back that they did not want them--that they were the children of thieves, outlaws and murderers, and they would not take them, they did not wish anything to do with them, and would not have them around their houses. Those children are now in the poor house in St. Louis. And yet after all this, I am told that there are many of the brethren who are willing to inform upon and swear against the brethren who were engaged in that affair. I hope there is no truth in this report. I hope there is no such person here, under the sound of my voice. But if there is, I will tell you my opinion of you, and the fact so far as your fate is concerned. Unless you repent at once of that unholy intention, and keep the secret of all that you know, you will die a dog's death, and be damned, and go to hell. I do not want to hear of any more treachery among my people."
These words of Brigham Young gave great comfort to all of us who were out in the woods keeeping [sic] out of the way of the officers. It insured our safety and took away our fears.
There has been all sorts of reports circulated about me, and the bigger the lie that was told the more readily it was believed.
I have told in this statement just what I did at the Mountain Meadows Massacre. The evidence of Jacob Hamblin is false in toto. Hamblin lied in every particular, so far as his evidence related to me.
It is my fate to die for what I did; but I go to my death with a certainty that it cannot be worse than my life has been for the last nineteen years.


As I have been in some respects a prominent man in the Mormon Church, the public may expect from me a statement of facts concerning other crimes and other things besides the Mountain Meadows Massacre. I do know some facts that I will state.

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I could give many things that would throw light on the doings of the Church, if I had my journals, but as I said, nearly all of my journals have been made way with by Brigham Young; at least I delivered them to him and never could get them again.
I have delivered to my Counsel, Wm. W. Bishop, such journals as I have, and shall leave the one that I am now keeping in prison, when I am released by death from the necessity of writing down my thoughts from day to day, and he can make such use of it as he thinks best.
My statement of outside matters must be brief, but such as they are, the public can rest certain of this thing, they are true.
As many people think that Brigham Young cut me off from the Church, and refused to recognize me a short time after the massacre, I will relate a circumstance that took place ten years after all the facts were known by him.
In 1867 or 1868, I met President Brigham Young and suite, at Parowan, seventy miles from Washington, the place where a part of my family resided. Lieut. James Pace was with me. The Prophet said to me, that he wanted uncle Jim Pace to go with me and prepare dinner for him and his suite at Washington, within three days. We were to go by my herd on the plains and in the valleys, and take several fat kids along and have a good dinner for them by the time they got there.
His will was our pleasure. We rode night and day, and felt thankful that we were worthy of the honor of serving the Prophet of the Living God. We did not consider the toil or loss of sleep a sacrifice, in such a laudable undertaking.
The time designated for dinner was one o'clock. The company arrived at eleven o'clock, two hours ahead of time. The Prophet drove up in front of Bishop Covington's house, on the same block where I lived; he halted about five minutes there, instead of driving direct to my house according to the previous arrangement. Then he turned his carriage around and got out with Amelia, his beloved, and went into the Bishop's house, leaving his suite standing in the streets. The peevish old man felt his dignity trampled on, because I was not present to the minute to receive him with an escort, to welcome and do homage to him upon entering the town.
As soon as I learned of his arrival I hastened to make apologies.
The Prophet heard my excuses, and said his family and

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brethren, all except himself and wife, could go to my house to dinner, that he would not eat until about two o'clock.
He then whispered to me and said, "Cut me a chunk off the breast of the turkey, and a piece of the loin of one of the fat kids, and put some rich gravy over it, and I will eat it at 2 P.M."
At two o'clock I again made his will my pleasure, and carried his dinner to him as requested, when he did me the honor of eating it. The rest of the company went to my house and took dinner.
Among my guests that day were George A. Smith, Bishop Hunter, John Taylor, W. Woodruff, several of the Prophet's sons and daughters, and many others. At dinner, George A. Smith and others of the Twelve Apostles laughed about the anger of Brigham, and said if the Old Boss had not got miffed, they would have lost the pleasure of eating the fat turkey. The party enjoyed themselves very much that day, and had many a laugh over the Prophet's anger robbing him of an excellent dinner.
I had part of my family at Washington, but I also had quite a family still living at Harmony, where several of my wives were staying.
The next morning the Prophet came to me and asked me if I was going to Harmony that night. I told him I did intend going.
"I wish you would go," said he, "and prepare dinner for us."
He then gave me full instructions what to prepare for dinner, and how he wanted his meat cooked, and said the company would be at my house in Harmony the next day at one o'clock, P. M.
I at once proceeded to obey his instructions. I rode to Harmony through a hard rain-storm, and I confess I was proud of my position. I then esteemed it a great honor to have the privilege of entertaing [sic] the greatest man living, the Prophet of the Lord.
My entire family at Harmony were up all night, cooking and making ready to feed and serve the Lord's anointed, and his followers.
I killed beeves, sheep, goats, turkeys geese, ducks and chickens, all of which were prepared according to instructions, and were eaten by Brigham Young and his party the next day.
Prompt to time, the Prophet, the President of the Church

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and his suite, and an escort on horseback, came into the Fort. There were seventy-three carriages, besides the escort. I entertained the entire party, giving them dinner, supper and breakfast.
In 1858 Governor Young called upon me to go and locate a company of cotton growers, of which Joseph Ham was captain. This company was sent out by Governor Young and the leading men of Salt Lake City, to test the growing of cotton on the Santa Clara and Rio Virgin bottoms. In obedience to counsel, I located the company at the mouth of the Santa Clara River, about four miles south from where St. George now stands.
In 1859 or 1860, the first trip that ex-Gov. Young took from Salt Lake City to Southern Utah, he went by way of Pinto, Mountain Meadows, Santa Clara and Washington. I was then at Washington, building a grist mill, some two miles west of the town, when he came along.
I was sitting on a rock about thirty steps from the road. His carriage was in the lead, as was usual with him when traveling. When he came opposite where I was sitting, he halted and called me to his carriage, and bid me get in, I did so. He seemed glad to see me, and asked where I lived. I told him I lived on the same block that Bishop Covington did, that he would pass my door in going to the Bishop's, as I then thought he would put up with the Bishop, and not with a private person.
In crossing the creek, on the way into town, the sand was heavy. I went to jump out and walk. He objected, saying,
"Sit still. You are of more value than horse-flesh yet."
When we neared my residence, he said:
"Is this where you live, John?"
I said, "It is," pointing at the same time to the east end of the block, and said, "That is where the Bishop lives."
The old man made no reply, but continued on. Then he said,
"You have a nice place here. I have a notion to stop with you."
I said, "You are always welcome to my house."
Then he said to the company, which consisted, I think, of seventy-three carriages, "Some of you had better scatter round among the brethren."
About half the company did so. The rest, with the Prophet, stayed at my house.
The next day, the whole company went on to Tokerville,

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twenty miles from my residence. I went with them to that place. In the evening all went to St. George, and held a two-days' meeting. At the close of the meeting, the Prophet called me to the stand, and said,
"John, I will be at New Harmony on Wednesday next." (By way of explanation, I will here say, the town of Harmony changed its location three times. The first fort was built at the crossing of the north fork of Ash Creek, in 1852, and was abandoned in 1853, during the war with the Ute Indians. In 1855, a new site was selected, four miles north-west of Harmony No. 1, and an adobe fort was built two hundred feet square, and twenty-two feet high. In 1860, Harmony No. 2 was demolished by a rain-storm, which continued twenty-eight days without stopping. At once after that, a site was selected at the head of Ash Creek, where a new settlement was started, which was called New Harmony.) "I want you to go and notify the Saints, and have a Bowery built, and prepare for our reception."
Jas. H. Imday was then President of that place, and was at the meeting. I here again tried to make the will of the Prophet my pleasure. I traveled all night, and reported the orders of the Prophet to the people.
Great preparations were made for his reception. A committee of arrangements was appointed, also a committee to wait on his Honor. Also an escort of fifteen men was selected to accompany this committee. They went out fifteen miles, where they met the Prophet and his followers and made a report of proceedings. He thanked them, and said, "I am going to stop with Brother John D.," as he often called me. I took no part in the proceedings except to report the will of the Prophet to the people. I went on horseback alone, and met the President, a [sic] he is now called. I met him a mile or more outside of the town. As I rode up he halted and said,
"John, I am going to stop with you."
I replied, "You know you are always welcome."
He then drove to the center of the town and halted; then he said,
"John, where do you live?"
I pointed across the field about half a mile.
Said he, "Have they fenced you out? You take the lead, and we will break a road to your house."
It being his will, we started and went to my house, sixteen

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carriages going along with us. Quite a number of the President's company had gone by Kanab, to Cedar City, to hold meetings in the settlements they would go through. The arrangements of the committee were treated with indifference, if not contempt by the President and his party. All the company but one carriage went to my house, that one stopped at James Pace's. During their stay at my house all were friendly. Brigham Young asked me to go with them to Cedar City, which I did.
In 1870, sometime in the Fall, I went from Parowan, by way of Panguich, up the Severe River with Brigham Young, on a trip to the Pareah country. On this trip I was appointed a road commissioner, with ten men to go ahead, view out and prepare the road for the President and his company to travel over.
While at Upper Kanab, I had a private interview with the Prophet, concerning my future destination. Brigham said he thought I had met with opposition and hardships enough to entitle me to have rest the balance of my life. That I had best leave Harmony, and settle in some of those good places farther South; build up a home and gather strength around me, and after a while we would cross over into Arizona Territory, near the San Francisco Mountains, and there establish the order of Enoch, or United Order. We were to take a portable steam saw mill to cut lumber with which to build up the Southern settlements, and I was to run the mill in connection with Bishop L. Stewart. This I then considered an additional honor shown me by the Prophet.
From Upper Kanab, I was sent across the mountains to Lower Kanab, to Bishop Stewart's, to have him carry supplies to the Prophet and company. I had to travel sixty miles without a trail, but I was glad of a chance to perform any duty that would please the Prophet. I again met the company, and went with the party to Tokerville, where I closed arrangements with President Young about the saw mill. All was understood and agreed upon, and we parted in a very friendly manner.
About two weeks after leaving President Young and party at Tokerville, I was notified that I had been suspended from the Church.
The following Spring, I visited the Prophet at St. George, and asked him why they had dealt so rashly with me, without allowing me a chance to speak for myself; why they had waited seven-

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teen years and then cut me off; why I was not cut off at once if what I had done was evil.
He replied, "I never knew the facts until lately."
I said, "President Young, you know that is not true. You know I told the whole story to you a short time after it happened, and gave you a full statement of everything connected with the massacre, and I then put more on myself than I was to blame for; and if your late informants have told you a story different from the one that I gave you soon after the massacre, when I reported the facts to you by order of Major Haight, they have lied like h--l, and you know it. I did nothing designedly wrong on that occasion. I tried to save that company from destruction after they were attacked, but I was overruled and forced to do all that I did do. I have had my name cast out as evil, but I know I have a reward awaiting me in Heaven. I have suffered in silence, and have done so to protect the brethren who committed the deed. I have borne the imputation of this crime long enough, and demand a rehearing. I demand that all the parties concerned be brought forward and forced by you to shoulder their own sins. I am willing to bear mine, but I will not submit to carry all the blame for those who committed the massacre.
The reply he made was this:
"Be a man, and not a baby. I am your friend, and not your enemy. You shall have a rehearing. Go up to the office and see Brother Erastus Snow, and arrange the time for the hearing."
I did so. We arranged the time of meeting. It was agreed that if the telegraph wires were working, all parties interested were to be notified of the meeting, and required to be present at St. George, Utah, on the following Wednesday, at 2, P. M.
All parties agreed to this, and after talking over the whole thing, I again parted with President Young, in a very friendly manner.
I went to Washington and staid at my house and with my family there. The next morning I started for Harmony, to visit my family there, and make arrangements for the rehearing that was to me of the greatest of importance. I then considered that if I was cut off from the Church I had better be dead; that out of the Church I could find no joys worth living for.
Soon after I left Washington, Erastus Snow, one of the twelve apostles, arrived at my house and asked for me. My family told

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him that I had gone to Harmony to arrange for the new hearing and trial before the Church authorities. He appeared to be much disappointed at not meeting me, and told my family that Brigham Young had reconsidered the matter, and there would be no rehearing or investigation; that the order cutting me off from the Church would stand; that he would send a letter to me which would explain all the matter, and that the letter would reach Harmony about as soon as I did.
On the next Tuesday night an anonymous letter was left at my house by one of the sons of Erastus Snow, with orders to hand it to me. The letter read as follows:

"JOHN D. LEE, of Washington:
"Dear Sir: If you will consult your own interest, and that of those that would be your friends, you will not press an investigation at this time, as it will only serve to implicate those that would be your friends, and cause them to suffer with, or inform upon you. Our advice is to make yourself scarce, and keep out of the way."

There was no signature to the letter, but I knew it came from apostle Snow, and was written by orders of Brigham Young.
When I read the letter I knew I had nothing to hope for from the Church, and my grief was as great as I could bear. To add to my troubles, Brigham Young sent word to my wives that they were all divorced from me and could leave me, if they wished to, do so. This was the greatest trouble that I ever had in my life, for I loved all my wives.
As the result of Brigham's advice, eleven of my wives deserted me, and have never lived with me since that time. I gave them all a fair share of the property that I then owned. I afterwards lost my large ferry-boat at my ferry on the Colorado River. Brigham Young was anxious to have the ferry kept in good condition for passing the river, for he did not know what hour he might need it, so he sent parties who put in another boat, which I afterwards paid him for.
I visited Brigham Young at his house in St. George in 1874, and never was received in a more friendly manner. He could always appear the saint when he was meditating treachery to one of his people. He then promised to restore me to membership in a short time.
Soon afterwards I was arrested (on or about the 9th of No-

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vember, 1874), and taken to Fort Cameron, in Beaver County, Utah Territory, and placed in prison there. A few days after my arrest I was visited in prison by General George A. Smith, Orson Hyde, Erastus Snow, A. F. McDonald, and many other leaders of the Church. They each and all told me to stand to my integrity, and all would come out right in the end.
At this time the Prophet was stopping with Bishop Murdock, in Beaver City. My wife Rachel went at night to see him and have a talk about my case. He received her with the utmost kindness, saying:
"Sister Rachel, are you standing by Brother John?"
"Yes, sir, I am," was her reply.
"That is right," said he. "God bless you for it. Tell Brother John to stand to his integrity to the end, and not a hair of his head shall be harmed."
This kindness was continued by the Churchmen until I was released on bail, in May, 1875.
And I will here say, I did not believe, until I was released on bail, that any member of the Church would desert me. I had every confidence that Brigham Young would save me at last. I knew then, as I know now, that he had the power, and I thought he had the will, to save me harmless. No man can be convicted in Utah if Brigham Young determines to save him, and I had his solemn word that I should not suffer. But now, when it is too late for me to help myself, I find I am selected by him as a victim to be offered up to keep the Gentiles from prosecuting any of his pets for murder or other crimes.
When I gained my freedom after nearly two years of imprisonment, I found that some of the good Saints had been tampering with my wife Emma, to get the ferry out of my hands. The "One-Eyed Pirate," as the Tribune calls him, told her that I was not a brother in the Church, and had tried to alienate her affections from me.
Up to this time I had always tried to make the will of the Priesthood my pleasure, but this last act of their kindness towards a brother who had been in prison for nearly two years, began to shake my faith in the anointed of the Lord.
The loss of the ferry--for I virtually lost control of it by their treachery--was a great blow to me in my destitute condition. I then felt that the time was near approaching when they would

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sacrifice and sell me to screen their pets and cover up their own sins.
When I came before the court, on the 11th day of September, 1876, I was met with the same hypocritical smile and whisper, as on other occasions, and told to "Stand to your integrity. Let the will of the Lord's anointed be your pleasure. My mouth is sealed, but I know you will come out all right."
So they talked to me, the leaders of the Church and its prominent men, all telling me the same thing, while at the same time those low, deceitful, treacherous, cowardly, dastardly sycophants and serfs had combined to fasten the rope around my neck. No doubt they thought they could lull me to sleep, until they could kill and make a scape-goat of me, to atone for the sins of the whole Church, which fully endorsed this treacherous treatment, as has been established by the oaths given by the false, treacherous, sneaking witnesses who came on the stand by order and command of the Church, to consummate the vile scheme formed for my destruction.
This last act of their charitable kindness let me out with them. All that I have made by making their will my pleasure, and yielding myself to their wishes, is the loss of my reputation, my fortune, my near and dear supposed friends, my salvation, and my all. My life now hangs on a single thread.
But is there no help for the widow's son? I can no longer expect help from the Church, or those of the Mormon faith. If I escape execution, it will be through the clemency of the nation, many of whose noble sons will dislike to see me sacrificed in this way. I acknowledge that I have been slow to listen to the advice of friends, who have warned me of the danger and treachery that awaited me. Yet I ask pardon for all the ingratitude with which I received their advice. When the people consider that I was ever taught to look upon treachery with horror, and that I have never permitted one nerve or fibre of this old frame to weaken or give way, notwithstanding the fact that I have been cut loose, and cast off and sacrificed by those who from their own stand-point, and according to their own theory, should have stood by me to the last, they may have some compassion for me. Perhaps all is for the best.
As it now stands, I feel free from all the obligations that have hitherto sealed my mouth, so far as the deeds of which I stand accused are concerned. I now consider myself at liberty to,

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and I now will state all the facts in the case, with which I am familiar. I am no traitor; I am only acting just to my own reputation. I am not sorry for the stand which I have taken, or my long silence.


Jacob Hamblin, commonly called "Dirty Fingered Jake," when called as a witness, gave as a reason for his long silence, concerning what he says I told him, that he was waiting for the right time to come, and he thought it had come now.
This reminds me of a circumstance that was related by Joseph Knight and John Lay, who were missionaries to the Indians under President Jacob Hamblin, at his headquarters at Santa Clara Fort, in 1859. In the Fall of 1859 two young men, on their way to California, stopped at the fort to recruit their jaded animals, and expecting that while doing so they might be so fortunate as to meet with some train of people going to the same place, so they would have company to San Bernardino, the young men staid at the fort some two months, daily expecting a company to pass that way, but still no one came. Hamblin assured them that they could go through the country with perfect safety. At the same time he had his plans laid to take their lives as soon as they started. The Indians around the fort wanted to kill the men at once, but Hamblin objected, and told the Indians to wait until the men got out on the desert--that if they would wait until the right time came they might then kill the men.
At last these young men started from the fort. Hamblin had told the Indians that the right time had come, and that he wanted the Indians to ambush themselves at a point agreed on near the desert, where the men could be safely killed. The Indians obeyed Hamblin's orders, and as the men came to the place of ambush the Indians fired upon them, and succeeded in killing one of the men. The other returned the fire, and shot one of Hamblin's right-hand men or pet Indians through the hand; this Indian's name was Queets, which means left-handed. By wounding this Indian he managed to escape, and returned to the fort, but doing so with the loss of the pack animals, provisions and the riding animal of his partner that lay dead upon the desert. The survivor stayed with Mr. Judd for a few days, when a com-

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pany of emigrants passed that way, and with them he succeeded in making his escape from the death that Hamblin had planned for him.
Hamblin was at Salt Lake City when the Mountain Meadows Massacre took place, and he pretends to have great sympathy with and sorrow for their fate. I can only judge what he would have done towards the massacre if he had been at home by what he did to help the next train that passed that way. When this train was passing through the settlements, Hamblin made arrangements with Nephi Johnson and his other interpreters (all of them were tools for Hamblin) how and where to relieve this company of the large herd of stock that belonged to the train. They had a large number of horses and cattle, more than five hundred head in all. Several interpreters were sent on ahead of the train. One of these was Ira Hatch. They were ordered by Hamblin to prepare the Indians to make a raid upon the stock, and these men and Indians obeyed orders then the same as my brethren and I did with the first company. About 10 o'clock, A. M., just after the train had crossed the Muddy, or a few miles beyond it on the desert, at the time and place as agreed on by Hamblin, and just as he had ordered it to be done, over one hundred Indians made a dash on the train and drove all the stock off to the Muddy.
The emigrants fired at the Indians, but the treacherous Nephi Johnson was acting as a guide, interpreter and friend to the whites; in fact that was how he came to be along with them was to pretend to aid them and protect them from Indians, but in fact he was there by order of Hamblin, to make the Indian raid on the stock a success.
Nephi Johnson rushed out and told the emigrants that if they valued their own lives they must not fire again, for if they did so he could not protect them from the cruelty of the savages--that the Indians would return and massacre them the same as they did the emigrants at Mountain Meadows.
The acting of Johnson and the other interpreters and spies that were with him, was so good that after a consultation the emigrants decided to follow his advice. The final conclusion was, that as Johnson was friendly with the Indians, and could talk their language, he should go and see the Indians, and try and get the stock back.
The emigrants waited on the desert, and Johnson went to the

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Indians, or pretended to do so. After a few hours he returned, and reported that the Indians were very hostile, and threatened to attack the train at once; that he was afraid he could not prevent it, and the only chance for the emigrants was in their instant departure; that as the emigrants would be gaining a place of safety, he would, at the risk of his life, make an effort to keep the Indians back, and pacify them. Also that he would report to Hamblin as soon as possible, and raise a force of men at the fort, and get back the stock, if it could be done, and would write to the company, giving an account of his success, so they would get his letter at San Bernardino, and if he recovered the stock, the emigrants could send back a party to receive it, and drive it to California.
Under the circumstances, the company adopted his plan, and he left them on the desert, with all their loose stock gone; but the danger was over, for the stock was what Hamblin and Johnson had been working for.
Johnson returned and ordered the Indians to drive the stock to the Clara. The Indians acted like good Mormons, and obeyed orders. Hamblin gave them a few head of cattle for their services in aiding him to steal the drove. The remainder of the cattle and horses the secret keeper, Hamblin, took charge of for the benefit of the Mission. As the cattle became fat enough for beef, they were sold or butchered for the use of the settlers. Some were traded to other settlements for sheep and other articles. In this way Hamblin used all of the stock stolen from the Dukes Company, except some forty head.
In order to keep up an appearance of honesty and fairness, Hamblin wrote a letter to Capt. Dukes, in the fall of 1860, saying that he had recovered a small portion of the company's stock from the Indians, by giving them presents, and that some of the stock had been traded to the settlers by the Indians. This letter was to be confirmed by all the missionaries and settlers, when the stock was to be called for by the former owners. No one was to give information that would lead to the discovery of the stock.
This was always the way when the Mormons committed a crime against the Gentiles. All the brethren were to help keep the secret. Some of the Dukes Company came back to Hamblin's for their cattle and horses, and after three weeks' diligent search among the secret keepers, they succeeded in getting about

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forty head of cattle, and returned with them to California. Several of the settlers were severely censured for giving the little information that was given, which led to the recovery of that small portion of the large herd of cattle and horses that the Saints, Hamblin and Johnson, had stolen by the help of the Indians, and the efforts of the brethren.


In the Winter of 1857-8 John Weston took an Irishman, that had been stopping with him as his guest several days, on a hunt, and when he got him in the brush and timber four miles west of Cedar City, he cut the throat of the Irishman and left the body unburied. A son of Weston said that his father received orders to kill the man because Isaac C. Haight considered him a spy.
Near the same time, Philip Klingensmith laid in ambush to kill Robert Keyes (now a resident of Beaver City, Utah Territory), while Keyes was irrigating in his field. Klingensmith wanted to kill Keyes because Keyes refused to give false testimony when requested to do so by Klingensmith, who was then Bishop of the Church. When Keyes came within a few feet of the hiding place of Klingensmith, this "holy" man raised his gun and took deliberate aim at Keyes' heart, but the cap bursted without exploding the powder, and so Keyes escaped.
After the Massacre, when Haight learned that Brigham Young did not fully approve of the deed, he then sought to screen himself, Higbee and Klingensmith, by putting me between them and danger. He reported that I was the big captain that planned, led and executed it; that the honor of such a noble deed for the avenging of the blood of the Prophets would lead to honor, immortality and eternal life in the kingdom of God; that I must stand to my integrity; that no man would ever be hurt. In this way it soon became a settled fact that I was the actual butcher and leader in that awful affair. Year by year that story has gained ground and strength, until I am now held responsible, and am to die, to save the Church. However, this is a regular trick of the Church leaders--use a man as long as he is of any use, and then throw him aside.
As I have stated in other places in my writings, the people in Utah who professed the Mormon religion were at and for some time before the massacre full of wild-fire and fanatical zeal, anx-

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ious to do something to build up the Kingdom of God on earth and to waste away the enemies of the Mormon religion. At that time it was a common thing for small bands of people on their way from California to pass through by way of Cedar City on their journey. Many of these people were killed simply because they were Gentiles. When a Gentile came into a town he was looked upon with suspicion, and most of the people considered every stranger a spy from the United States army. The killing of Gentiles was considered a means of grace and a virtuous deed.
I remember an affair that transpired at the old distillery in Cedar City, just before the massacre. I was informed of it when I went to Cedar City, by the chief men there, and I may say I know it to be true. The facts are as follows: Three men came to Cedar City one evening; they were poor, and much worn by their long journey. They were on their way to California. They were so poor and destitute that the authorities considered they were dangerous men, so they reported that they were spies from Johnston's army, and ordered the brethren to devise a plan to put them out of the way, decently and in order. That the will of God, as made known through Haight and Klingensmith, might be done, these helpless men were coaxed to go to the old distillery and take a drink. They went in company with John M. Highee, John Weston, James Haslem and Wm. C. Stewart, and I think another man, but if so I have forgotten his name. The party drank considerable, and when the emigrants got under the influence of the whisky the brethren attacked them, and knocked the brains out of two of the men with the king-bolt of a wagon. The third man was very powerful and muscular; he fought valiantly for his life, but after a brief struggle he was over-come and killed. They were buried near Cedar City.
This deed was sustained by all the people there. The parties who did the killing were pointed out as true, valiant men, zealous defenders of the faith, and as fine examples for the young men to pattern after.


Sometime in the Fall of 1857, not long after the Mountain Meadows Massacre, it was decided by the authorities at Salt Lake City that Lieut. Tobin must be killed. Tobin had left a train at Salt Lake, joined the Church there, and afterwards mar-

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ried a daughter or General Charles C. Rich, one of the Twelve Apostles. Tobin was quite a smart man, and soon after his marriage he was sent to England on a mission.
While preaching in England, it was reported that he had committed adultery there, and he was ordered home. On his arrival in Salt Lake he was cut off from the Church, and I think his wife was taken from him by order of the Church. He made several efforts to get out of the Territory. Finally he got with a company en-route for California, and left Salt Lake, intending to go to California, to escape the persecutions that were being forced upon him by the Church authorities. After he had been gone a few days the "Destroying Angels" were put on his trail, with orders to kill him without fail before they returned. Two desperate fanatics were selected, who knew nothing but to obey orders. Joel White and John Willis were the parties.
They started on the trail, determined to kill Tobin when they could find him. They had no cause to find fault with him; he had never injured them, but he had in some way fallen under the ban of the Church, and his death had been decreed. These vile tools of the Church leaders were keeping their oaths of obedience to the Priesthood, and were as willing to shed blood at the command of the Prophet or any of the apostles, as ever Inquisitor was to apply the rack to an offending heretic in the dungeons of the Inquisition. In fact Mormonism is Jesuitism refined and perfected.
White and Willis overtook the company that Lieut. Tobin was traveling with, at a point at or near the crossing of the Magottsey. They found where he was sleeping, and going right up to him as he lay on the ground, rolled up in his blanket, they shot him several times, and at last thinking him dead, they concluded to shoot him once more to make certain that he would not escape. So they put a pistol right up against his eye, and fired; the ball put out his eye, but did not kill him.
The "angels " made their escape and returned to Salt Lake City, and reported that their orders were obeyed.
Severely wounded as he was, Lieut. Tobin recovered, and was when I last heard from him in the Union army.


At Parowan, in 1855 or 1856, there was a case that for a while shook my faith in the Church, but I soon got over it and

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was like others, satisfied that all was done for the glory of God, but that I was so sinful that I could not understand it.
There was a man living there by the name of Robert Gillespie. He was a member of the Church, had one wife, and owned a fine property. Gillespie wanted to be sealed to his sister-in-law, but for some reason his request was denied. He had known of others obtaining wives by committing adultery first and then being sealed to avoid scandal. So he tried it, and then went to the apostle George A. Smith, and again asked to be sealed to the woman; but George A. had a religious fit on him,, or something else, so he refused to seal him or let him be sealed, giving as his reason for refusing, that Gillespie had exercised the rights of sealing without first obtaining orders to do so. A warrant was issued and Gillespie arrested and placed under guard, he was also sued in the Probate Court, before James Lewis, Probate Judge, and a heavy judgment was rendered against him, and all his property was sold to pay the fine and costs. The money was put into the Church fund and Gillespie was broken up entirely and forced to leave the Territory in a destitute condition.
Many such cases came under my observation. I have known the Church to act in this way and break up and destroy many, very many men. The Church was then, and in that locality, supreme. None could safely defy or disobey it. The Church authorities used the laws of the land, the laws of the Church, and Danites and "Angels" to enforce their orders, and rid the country of those who were distasteful to the leaders. And I say as a fact that there was no escape for any one that the leaders of the Church in Southern Utah selected as a victim.


The fate of old man Braffett, of Parowan, was a peculiar one, and as it afterwards led me into trouble, I will give the story briefly, to show the power of the Priesthood and the peculiarity of the people there.
Old man Braffett lived at Parowan, and in the Fall of 1855 a man by the name of Woodward came to Braffett's house and stopped there to recruit his teams before crossing the deserts. Woodward had two wives. He had lived in Nauvoo, and while there had been architect for the Nauvoo House. While Woodward and his family were stopping with Braffett, one of his wives

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concluded that she would be damned if she went to live in California--leaving the land of the Saints--and she asked to be divorced from Woodward and sealed to Braffett. At first Braffett refused to take her, but she was a likely and healthy woman. She made love to the old man in earnest, and finally induced him to commit adultery with her. The parties were discovered in the act by old Mrs. Braffett, and she was not so firm in the faith as to permit her husband to enjoy himself without making a fuss about it. The authorities were informed of Braffett's transgressions, and he was arrested and taken before the Probate Judge and tried for the sin of adultery. He made a bill of sale of some of his property to me, for which I paid him before his trial. After hearing the case, the Probate Judge fined him $1,000, and ordered him to be imprisoned until the fine and costs were paid. Ezra Curtis, the then marshal at Parowan, took all of Braffett's property that could be found and sold it for the purpose of paying the fine, but the large amount of property which was taken was sold for a small sum, for the brethren would not bid much, for property taken from one who had broken his covenants.
Being unable to pay the fine, the old man was ordered to be taken to Salt Lake City, to be imprisoned in the prison there. I was selected to take him to Salt Lake. I took the old man there, and after many days spent in working with Brigham Young and his apostles, I succeeded in securing a pardon from Brigham for the old man.
Braffett was put to work at Salt Lake by Brigham Young. He dared not return home at that time. His property was all gone, and he was ruined.
The part I took to befriend the old man made several of the brethren at Parowan mad at me, and they swore they would have revenge against me for interfering where I was not interested. I staid in Salt Lake some time, and when I started home there were quite a number of people along. All the teams were heavily loaded; the roads were bad, and our teams weak. We all had to walk much of the time. After we had passed the Severe River the road was very bad. My team was the best in the whole company, and I frequently let some of the women who were in the party ride in my wagon. One evening, just about dark, I was asked by a young woman, by the name of Alexander, to let her ride, as she was very tired walking. I had her get in the wagon with my wife Rachel, and she rode there until

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we camped for the night. I got into the wagon after dark and drove the team. We had ridden along this way an hour or so, when Rachel said she was going to ride a while in the next wagon, which was driven by my son-in-law, Mr. Dalton. Soon after Rachel got out of the wagon, a couple of my enemies rode by. I spoke to them, and they rode on. As soon as these men reached the camp they reported that I had been taking improper privileges with Miss Alexander. I was at once told to consider myself under arrest, and that as soon as we reached Parowan I would be tried by the Council for violating my covenants. I was surprised and grieved at the charge, for I was innocent, and the young woman was a very fine and virtuous woman, and as God is soon to judge me, I declare I never knew of her committing any sin. But she had to suffer slander upon her good name simply because she was befriended by me.
When we reached Parowan there was a meeting called by the Priesthood to try me. This Council was composed of the President of that Stake of Zion and his two Counselors, the High Council, the City Council and the leading men of Parowan. It was a general meeting of the authorities, Church and civil, at Parowan. The meeting was held in a chamber that was used for a prayer circle. It was called a circle room, because the people met there to transact private business and to hold prayer in a circle, which was done in this way. All the brethren would kneel in a circle around the room, near enough to each other for their arms to touch, so that the influence would be more powerful. When the meeting was called to order all the lights were put out, and I was taken into the room and placed on trial. The charge was stated to me and I was ordered to confess my guilt. I told them I was innocent; that I had committed no crime--in fact had not thought of wrong. I told the truth, just as it was. I was then ordered to stand one side.
The young woman was then brought into the room, and as she came in a pistol was placed to my head and I was told to keep silent. She was questioned and threatened at great length, but not all the threats that they could use would induce her to tell a falsehood. She insisted that I was entirely innocent.
Next her father, an old man, was introduced and questioned. He told the Council that he had diligently enquired into the matter, and believed I was innocent.
Neither the young woman nor her father knew who was in the

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room. All they knew was that they were being examined before the secret tribunal of Utah, and that a false oath in that place would ensure their death.
When the evidence had been received and the witnesses retired; the candles were again lighted. Then speeches were made by most of the men present, and every one but two spoke in favor of my conviction. Without taking a vote the meeting adjourned, or rather left that place and went somewhere else to consult. I was left in the dark, the house locked and guards placed around the building. I was told that my fate would soon be decided, and I would then be informed what it was to be. I knew so well the manner of dealing in such cases that I expected to be assassinated in the dark, but for some reason it was not done.
Next morning some food was brought to me, but I was still kept a prisoner and refused the liberty of consulting with any friends or any of my family.
Late that day I looked out of the window of the chamber where I was confined, and saw a man by the name of John Steel. He was first Counselor to the President of that Stake of Zion. I called to him and asked him to secure my freedom. After stating the case to him he promised to see what could be done for me, and went off. Through his exertions I was soon released I was told to go home and hold myself subject to orders--that my case was not yet decided.
I went home, but for months I expected to be assassinated everyday, for it was the usual course of the authorities to send an "Angel" after all men who were charged or suspected of having violated their covenants.
Nothing farther was done about the case, but it was held over me as a means of forcing me to live in accordance with the wishes of the Priesthood and to prevent me from again interfering with the Church authorities when they saw fit to destroy a man, as they destroyed old man Braffett, and I believe it did have the effect to make me more careful who I befriended.
In 1854 (I think that was the year) there was a young man, a Gentile, working in Parowan. He was quiet and orderly, but was courting some of the girls. He was notified to quit, and let the girls alone, but he still kept going to see some of them. This was contrary to orders. No Gentile was at that time allowed to keep company with or visit any Mormon girl or

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woman. The authorities decided to have the young man killed, so they called two of Bishop Dames' Destroying Angels, Barney Carter and old man Gould, and told them to take that cursed young Gentile "over the rim of the basin." That was a term used by the people when they killed a person.
The destroying angels made some excuse to induce the young man to go with them on an excursion, and when they got close to Shirts' mill, near Harmony, they killed him, and left his body in the brush.
The Indians found the body, and reported the facts to me soon afterwards. I was not at home that night, but Carter and Gould went to my house and staid there all night. Rachel asked them where they had been. They told her they had been on a mission to take a young man, a Gentile, over the rim of the basin, and Carter showed her his sword, which was all bloody, and he said he used that to help the Gentile over the edge. Rachel knew what they meant when they spoke of sending him "over the rim of the basin." It was at that time a common thing to see parties going out of Cedar City and Harmony, with suspected Gentiles, to send them "over the rim of the basin," and the Gentiles were always killed.
This practice was supported by all the people, and every thing of that kind was done by orders from the Council, or by orders from some of the Priesthood. When a Danite or a destroying angel was placed on a man's track, that man died, certain, unless some providential act saved him, as in Tobin's case; he was saved because the "angels" believed he was dead.
The Mormons nearly all, and I think every one of them in Utah previous to the massacre at Mountain Meadows, believed in blood atonement. It was taught by the leaders and believed by the people that the Priesthood were inspired and could not give a wrong order. It was the belief of all that I ever heard talk of these things--and I have been with the Church since the dark days in Jackson County--that the authority that ordered a murder committed, was the only responsible party, that the man who did the killing was only an instrument, working by command of a superior, and hence could have no ill will against the person killed, but was only acting by authority and committed no wrong. In other words, if Brigham Young or any of his apostles, or any of the Priesthood, gave an order to a man, the act was the act of the one giving the order, and the man doing the

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act was only an instrument of the person commanding--just as much of an instrument as the knife that was used to cut the throat of the victim. This being the belief of all good Mormons, it is easily understood why the orders of the Priesthood were so blindly obeyed by the people.
Another circumstance came to my knowledge soon after it was done that will speak for itself. Not far from the time of the Mountain Meadows massacre, there was an emigrant who claimed to be a Mormon, but I never knew whether he was one or not, that worked a number of months for Captain Jacob Huffine, at Parowan. This man wanted his pay; it was not convenient to pay him; he insisted on being paid, but not getting his wages, he determined to leave there. He started away from the settlement at Summit, about seven miles from Parowan. The Indians of Parowan were sent for and ordered to overtake and kill the man. They did so, and shot him full of arrows. The man called to the Indians and told them that he was a Mormon and they must not kill him.
The Indians replied by saying,
"We know you, you are no Mormon, you are a Mericat; the Mormons told us to kill you."
They then beat his head with rocks, and cut his throat, then went back to Parowan and reported what they had done.
I was told all about this by the Indians. But I never enquired into the facts, for I then believed, and still have reasons to think the man was killed by authority. He had offended in some way, and his death was like that of many others, the result of orders from the Priesthood.


William Laney, of Harrisburg, Utah Territory, had formed the acquaintance of the family or Aden while on a mission to Tennessee, and he was saved from a mob who threatened his death because he was a Mormon preacher. When Fancher's train reached Parowan, Mr. Laney met young Aden and recognized him as the son of the man who had saved his life. Aden told him that he was hungry, that he and his comrades had been unable to purchase supplies from the Mormons ever since they left Salt Lake City, and that there appeared to be a conspiracy that had been formed against that train by which the Mormons had agreed to starve the emigrants. Laney took young

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Aden to his house, gave him his supper, and let him sleep there that night. The next day Laney was accused by leading men with being unfaithful to his obligations. They said he had supported the enemies of the Church and given aid and comfort to one whose hands were still red with the blood of the Prophets. A few nights after that the Destroying Angels, who were doing the bidding of Bishop Dame, were ordered to kill William Laney to save him from his sins, he having violated his endowment oath and furnished food to a man who had been declared an outlaw by the Mormon Church. The "Angels" were commanded by Barney Carter, a son-in-law of Wm. H. Dame, who now lives in Los Angeles County, California. The Angels called Laney out of the house, saying that Bishop Dame wished to see him. As Laney passed through the gate into the street, he was struck across the back of the head with a large club by Barney Carter. His skull was fractured somewhat and for many months Laney lay at the point of death, and his mind still shows the effect of the injury he then received, for his brain has never quite settled since. I have frequently talked with Laney about this matter, but as he was fully initiated into the mysteries of the Church, he knows that he will yet be killed if his life can be taken with safety, if he make public the facts connected with the conspiracy to take his life. He is still strong in the Mormon faith, and almost believes that Dame had the right to have him killed. At the time Carter attempted to take the life of Laney, the Mormon Church was under the blaze of the reformation, and punishment by death was the penalty for refusing to obey the orders of the Priesthood.
One of the objects of the reformation was to place the Priesthood in possession of every secret act and crime that had been committed by a man of the Church. These secrets were obtained in this way: a meeting would be called; some Church leader would make a speech, defining the duties that the people owed to the Priesthood, and instructing the people why it was necessary that the Priesthood should control the entire acts of the people, and it was preached that to keep back any fact from the knowledge of the Priesthood was an unpardonable sin. After one or more such discourses, the people were called upon by name, commanded to rise from their seats, and standing in the midst of the congregation, to publicly confess all their sins. If the confession was not full and complete, it was also made the

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duty of the members of the Church, or any one of them who knew that the party confessing had committed a crime, which he had not divulged, it was then to he made public by the party knowing the same. Unless the party then confessed, a charge was preferred against him or her for a violation of covenants, and unless full confession and repentance immediately followed, the sinful member was to be slain for the remission of his sins, it being taught by the leaders and believed by the people that the right thing to do with a sinner who did not repent and obey the Council, was to take the life of the offending party, and, thus save his everlasting soul. This was called "Blood Atonement." The members who fully confessed their sins were again admitted into the Church and rebaptized, they taking new covenants to obey any and all orders of the Priesthood, and to refuse all manner of assistance, friendship or communication with those who refused a strict obedience to the authorities of the Church.
The most deadly sin among the people was adultery, and many men were killed in Utah for that crime.
Rosmos Anderson was a Danish man who had come to Utah with his family to receive the benefits arising from an association with the "Latter-Day Saints." He had married a widow lady somewhat older than himself, and she had a daughter that was fully grown at the time of the reformation. The girl was very anxious to be sealed to her step-father, and Anderson was equally anxious to take her for a second wife, but as she was a fine-looking girl, Klingensmith desired her to marry him, and she refused. At one of the meetings during the reformation Anderson and his step-daughter confessed that they had committed adultery, believing when they did so that Brigham Young would allow them to marry when he learned the facts. Their confession being full, they were rebaptized and received into full membership. They were then placed under covenant that if they again committed adultery, Anderson should suffer death. Soon after this a charge was laid against Anderson before the Council, accusing him of adultery with his step-daughter. This Council was composed of Klingensmith and his two counselors; it was the Bishop's Council. Without giving Anderson any chance to defend himself or make a statement, the Council voted that Anderson must die for violating his covenants. Klingensmith went to Anderson and notified him that the orders were that he

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must die by having his throat cut, so that the running of his blood would atone for his sins. Anderson, being a firm believer in the doctrines and teachings of the Mormon Church, made no objections, but asked for half a day to prepare for death. His request was granted. His wife was ordered to prepare a suit of clean clothing, in which to have her husband buried, and was informed that he was to be killed for his sins, she being directed to tell those who should enquire after her husband that he had gone to California.
Klingensmith, James Haslem, Daniel McFarland and John M. Higbee dug a grave in the field near Cedar City, and that night, about 12 o'clock, went to Anderson's house and ordered him to make ready to obey the Council. Anderson got up, dressed himself, bid his family good-bye, and without a word of remonstrance accompanied those that he believed were carrying out the will of the "Almighty God." They went to the place where the grave was prepared; Anderson knelt upon the side of the grave and prayed. Klingensmith and his company then cut Anderson's throat from ear to ear and held him so that his blood ran into the grave.
As soon as he was dead they dressed him in his clean clothes, threw him into the grave and buried him. They then carried his bloody clothing back to his family, and gave them to his wife to wash, when she was again instructed to say that her husband was in California. She obeyed their orders.
No move of that kind was made at Cedar City, unless it was done by order of the "Council" or of the "High Council." I was at once informed of Anderson's death, because at that time I possessed the confidence of all the people, who would talk to me confidentially, and give me the particulars of all crimes committed by order of the Church. Anderson was killed just before the Mountain Meadows massacre. The killing of Anderson was then considered a religious duty and a just act. It was justified by all the people, for they were bound by the same covenants, and the least word of objection to thus treating the man who had broken his covenant would have brought the same fate upon the person who was so foolish as to raise his voice against any act committed by order of the Church authorities.
Brigham Young knew very well that I was not a man who would willingly take life, and therefore I was not ordered to do

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his bloody work. I never took part in any killing that was desired or ordered by the Church, except the part I took in the Mountain Meadows Massacre. I was well known by all the members of the Church as one that stood high in the confidence of Brigham Young, and that I was close-mouthed and reliable. By this means I was usually informed of the facts in every case where violence was used in the section of country where I resided. I knew of many men being killed in Nauvoo by the Danites. It was then the rule that all the enemies of Joseph Smith should be killed, and I know of many a man who was quietly put out of the way by the orders of Joseph and his Apostles while the Church was there.
It has always been a well understood doctrine of the Church that it was right and praiseworthy to kill every person who spoke evil of the Prophet. This doctrine had been strictly lived up to in Utah, until the Gentiles arrived in such great numbers that it became unsafe to follow the practice, but the doctrine is still believed, and no year passes without one or more of those who have spoken evil of Brigham Young being killed, in a secret manner.
Springfield, Utah, was one of the hot-beds of fanaticism, and I expect that more men were killed there, in proportion to population, than in any other part of Utah. In that settlement it was certain death to say a word against the authorities, high or low.
In Utah it has been the custom with the Priesthood to make eunuchs of such men as were obnoxious to the leaders. This was done for a double purpose; first, it gave a perfect revenge, and next, it left the poor victim a living example to others of the dangers of disobeying counsel and not living as ordered by the Priesthood.
In Nauvoo it was the orders from Joseph Smith and his apostles to beat, wound and castrate all Gentiles that the police could take in the act of entering or leaving a Mormon household under circumstances that led to the belief that they had been there for immoral purposes. I knew of several such outrages while there. In Utah it was the favorite revenge of old, worn-out members of the Priesthood, who wanted young women sealed to them, and found that the girl preferred some handsome young man. The old priests generally got the girls, and many a young man was unsexed for refusing to give up his sweetheart at the

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request of an old and failing, but still sensual apostle or member of the Priesthood.
As an illustration I will refer to an instance that many a good Saint knows to be true.
Warren Snow was Bishop of the Church at Manti, San Pete County, Utah. He had several wives, but there was a fair, buxom young woman in the town that Snow wanted for a wife. He made love to her with all his powers, went to parties where she was, visited her at her home, and proposed to make her his wife. She thanked him for the honor offered, but told him she was then engaged to a young man, a member of the Church, and consequently could not marry the old priest. This was no sufficient reason to Snow. He told her it was the will of God that she should marry him, and she must do so; that the young man could be got rid of, sent on a mission or dealt with in some way so as to release her from her engagement--that, in fact, a promise made to the young man was not binding, when she was informed that it was contrary to the wishes of the authorities.
The girl continued obstinate. The "teachers" of the town visited her and advised her to marry Bishop Snow. Her parents, under the orders of the Counselors of the Bishop, also insisted that their daughter must marry the old man. She still refused. Then the authorities called on the young man and directed him to give up the young woman. This he steadfastly refused to do. He was promised Church preferment, celestial rewards, and everything that could be thought of--all to no purpose. He remained true to his intended, and said he would die before he would surrender his intended wife to the embraces of another.
This unusual resistance of authority by the young people made Snow more anxious than ever to capture the girl. The young man was ordered to go on a mission to some distant locality, so that the authorities would have no trouble in effecting their purpose of forcing the girl to marry as they desired. But the mission was refused by the still contrary and unfaithful young man.
It was then determined that the rebellious young man must be forced by harsh treatment to respect the advice and orders of the Priesthood. His fate was left to Bishop Snow for his decision. He decided that the young man should be castrated; Snow saying, "When that is done, he will not be liable to want

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the girl badly, and she will listen to reason when she knows that her lover is no longer a man."
It was then decided to call a meeting of the people who lived true to counsel, which was to be held in the school-house in Manti, at which place the young man should be present, and dealt with according to Snow's will. The meeting was called. The Young man was there, and was again requested, ordered and threatened, to get him to surrender the young woman to Snow, but true to his plighted troth, he refused to consent to give up the girl. The lights were then put out. An attack was made on the young man. He was severely beaten, and then tied with his back down on a bench, when Bishop Snow took a bowie-knife, and performed the operation in a most brutal manner, and then took the portion severed from his victim and hung it up in the school-house on a nail, so that it could be seen by all who visited the house afterwards.
The party then left the young man weltering in his blood, and in a lifeless condition. During the night he succeeded in releasing himself from his confinement, and dragged himself to some hay-stacks, where he lay until the next day, when he was discovered by his friends. The young man regained his health, but has been an idiot or quiet lunatic ever since, and is well known by hundreds of both Mormons and Gentiles in Utah.
After this outrage old Bishop Snow took occasion to get up a meeting at the school-house, so as to get the people of Manti, and the young woman that he wanted to marry, to attend the meeting. When all had assembled, the old man talked to the people about their duty to the Church, and their duty to obey counsel, and the dangers of refusal, and then publicly called attention to the mangled parts of the young man, that had been severed from his person, and stated that the deed had been done to teach the people that the counsel of the Priesthood must be obeyed. To make a long story short, I will say, the young woman was soon after forced into being sealed to Bishop Snow.
Brigham Young, when he heard of this treatment of the young man, was very mad, but did nothing against Snow. He left him in charge as Bishop at Manti, and ordered the matter to be hushed up. This is only one instance of many that I might give to show the danger of refusing to obey counsel in Utah.
It frequently happened that men would become dissatisfied with the Church or something else in Utah, and try to leave the

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Territory. The authorities would try to convince such persons that they ought to remain, but if they insisted on going, they were informed that they had permission to do so. When the person had started off, with his stock and property, it was nearly always the rule to send a lot of Danites to steal all the stock and run it off into the mountains; so that in the majority of cases the people would return wholly broken up and settle down again as obedient members of the Church. It was a rare thing for a man to escape from the Territory with all of his property, until after the Pacific Railroad was built through Utah. It was the general custom to rob the persons who were leaving the country, but many of them were killed, because it was considered they would tell tales that should not be made public, in the event of their reaching Gentile settlements.
Brigham Young discouraged mining at all times, and when any man found any metal he was ordered to keep it a secret. The people were taught to believe that the Latter-Day Saints would soon own all the wealth of the earth, and that no people but Mormons would be alive in a few years. That when the earth was conquered and the truths of Mormonism were universally acknowledged, the people would then have all the wealth they desired. Gold would be as plenty as silver, silver as plenty as brass, brass as plenty as stone, and stone as plenty as wood. That this gold, silver and other metals and precious stones would then be used for beautifying places of worship, and to make holy vessels of, and each man was to have all the wealth be could use or enjoy, if he was only faithful in these last days.
As a matter to satisfy the public, I will give the following facts connected with my personal history:
When I moved to Nauvoo, I had one wife and one child. Soon after I got there, I was appointed as the Seventh Policeman. I had superiors in office, and was sworn to secrecy, and to obey the orders of my superiors, and not let my left hand know what my right hand did. It was my duty to do as I was ordered, and not to ask questions. I was instructed in the secrets of the Priesthood to a great extent, and taught to believe, as I then did believe, that it was my duty, and the duty of all men to obey the leaders of the Church, and that no man could commit sin so long as he acted in the way that he was directed by his Church superiors. I was one of the Life Guard of the Prophet Joseph Smith.

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One day the Chief of Police came to me and said that I must take two more policemen that he named, and watch the house of a widow woman named Clawson. She was the mother of H. B. Clawson, of Salt Lake City. I was informed that a man went there nearly every night about ten o'clock, and left about day light. I was also ordered to station myself and my men near the house, and when the man came out we were to knock him down and castrate him, and not to be careful how hard we hit, for it would not be enquired into if we killed him.
I did not believe that the Chief of Police knew just what he was doing. I felt a timidity about carrying out the orders. It was my duty to report all unusual orders that I received from my superiors on the police force, to the Prophet Joseph Smith, or in his absence, to Hyrum, next in authority. I went to the house of the Prophet to report, but he was not at home. I then called for Hyrum, and he gave me an interview. I told him the orders that I had received from the Chief, and asked him if I should obey or not. He said to me,
"Brother Lee, you have acted wisely in listening to the voice of the Spirit. It was the influence of God's Spirit that sent you here. You would have been guilty of a great crime if you had obeyed your Chief's orders."
Hyrum then told me that the man that I was ordered to attack was Howard Egan, and that he had been sealed to Mrs. Clawson, and that their marriage was a most holy one; that it was in accordance with a revelation that the Prophet had recently received direct from God. He then explained to me fully the doctrines of polygamy, and wherein it was permitted, and why it was right.
I was greatly interested in the doctrine. It accorded exactly with my views of the Scripture, and I at once accepted and believed in the doctrine as taught by the revelations received by Joseph Smith, the Prophet. As a matter of course I did not carry out the orders of the Chief. I had him instructed in his duty, and so Egan was never bothered by the police.
A few months after that I was sealed to my second wife. I was sealed to her by Brigham Young, then one of the Twelve. In less than one year after I first learned the will of God concerning the marriage of the Saints, as made known by Him in a revelation to Joseph Smith, I was the husband of nine wives.

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I took my wives in the following order: first, Agathe Ann Woolsey; second, Nancy Berry; third, Louisa Free (now one of the wives of Daniel H. Wells); fourth, Sarah C. Williams; fifth, old Mrs. Woolsey (she was the mother of Agathe Ann and Rachel A. I married her for her soul's sake, for her salvation in the eternal state); sixth, Rachel A. Woolsey (I was sealed to her at the same time that I was to her mother); seventh, Andora Woolsey (a sister to Rachel); eighth, Polly Ann Workman; ninth, Martha Berry; tenth, Delithea Morris. In 1847, while at Council Bluffs, Brigham Young sealed me to three women in one night, viz., eleventh, Nancy Armstrong (she was what we called a widow. She left her first husband in Tennessee, in order to be with the Mormon people); twelfth, Polly V. Young; thirteenth, Louisa Young (these two were sisters.) Next, I was sealed to my fourteenth wife, Emeline Vaughn. In 1851, I was sealed to my fifteenth wife, Mary Lear Groves. In 1856, I was sealed to my sixteenth wife, Mary Ann Williams. In 1858, BrighamYoung gave me my seventeenth wife, Emma Batchelder. I was sealed to her while a member of the Territorial Legislature. Brigham Young said that Isaac C. Haight, who was also in the Legislature, and I, needed some young women to renew our vitality, so he gave us both a dashing young bride. In 1859 I was sealed to my eighteenth wife, Teressa Morse. I was sealed to her by order of Brigham Young. Amasa Lyman officiated at the ceremony. The last wife I got was Ann Gordge. Brigham Young gave her to me, and I was sealed to her in Salt Lake by Heber C. Kimball. This was my nineteenth, but, as I was married to old Mrs. Woolsey for her soul's sake, and she was near sixty years old when I married her, I never considered her really as a wife. True, I treated her well and gave her all the rights of marriage. Still I never count her as one of my wives. That is the reason that I claim only eighteen true wives.
After 1861 I never asked Brigham Young for another wife. By my eighteen real wives I have been the father of sixty-four children. Ten of my children are dead and fifty-four are still living.
This is all I care to say about my own acts or the affairs of my family.
I have but little more to say.
To the jurymen who tried me, I say I have no unkind feelings. The evidence was strong against me, and with that, and the in-

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structions of the Court as they were given, the jury could do nothing but convict.
To the officers who have had me in charge during my confinement I return my thanks for their personal kindness. I give them the thanks of an old man, who is about to leave this earth and go to another sphere of existence.
The few guardsmen who misused me I forgive, for they were not conscious of their own wickedness.
If I have sinned and violated the laws of my country, I have done so because I have blindly followed and obeyed the orders of the Church leaders. I was guided in all that I did which is called criminal, by the orders of the leaders in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. I have never knowingly disobeyed the orders of the Church since I joined it at Far West, Missouri, until I was deserted by Brigham Young and his slaves.
I have selected Wm. W. Bishop as the person that I wish to publish my life and confessions, so that the world may know just what I did do, and why I acted as I have done. I have delivered Mr. Bishop all of the manuscripts and private writings that are in my possession, and wish him to have all that I may hereafter write. I have assigned him all my writings, and he is the only person on earth who has a right to publish my life or my confessions.
To my attorneys, one and all, who have given me their valuable services, I return my kindest thanks, and regret that poverty prevents my paying them for what they have done for me.
To my family I say, may God pour rich blessings upon you, one and all. I ask you to live here on earth so that you can justly claim a seat in the realms of bliss after life's troubles are ended.
To my enemies I say, judge not, that ye be not judged. In life you were often unjust to me. After I am dead remember to be charitable to one who never designedly did a wrong.


Written in prison at Fort Cameron, near Beaver City, Utah Territory. Delivered to Hon. Sumner Howard by John D. Lee, on the field of execution, just before the sentence of death was carried into effect.

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Forwarded to Wm. W. Bishop, by Hon. Sumner Howard, according to the last request of John D. Lee.

CAMP CAMERON, March 13th, 1877.

Morning clear, still and pleasant. The guard, George Tracy, informs me that Col. Nelson and Judge Howard have gone. Since my confinement here, I have reflected much over my sentence, and as the time of my execution is drawing near, I feel composed, and as calm as the summer morning. I hope to meet my fate with manly courage. I declare my innocence. I have done nothing designedly wrong in that unfortunate and lamentable affair with which I have been implicated. I used my utmost endeavors to save them from their sad fate. I freely would have given worlds, were they at my command, to have averted that evil. I wept and mourned over them before and after, but words will not help them, now it is done. My blood cannot help them, neither can it make that atonement required. Death to me has no terror. It is but a struggle, and all is over. I much regret to part with my loved ones here, especially under that odium of disgrace that will follow my name; that I cannot help.
I know that I have a reward in Heaven, and my conscience does not accuse me. This to me is a great consolation. I place more value upon it than I would upon an eulogy without merit. If my work is done here on earth, I ask my God in Heaven, in the name of His Son Jesus Christ, to receive my spirit, and allow me to meet my loved ones who have gone behind the vail. The bride of my youth and her faithful mother, my devoted friend and companion, N. A., also my dearly beloved children, all of whom I parted from with sorrow, but shall meet them with joy--I bid you all an affectionate farewell. I have been treacherously betrayed and sacrificed in the most cowardly manner by those who should have been my friends, and whose will I have diligently striven to make my pleasure, for the last thirty years at least. In return for my faithfulness and fidelity to him and his cause, he has sacrificed me in a most shameful and cruel way. I leave them in the hands of the Lord to deal with them according to the merits of their crimes, in the final restitution of all things.


I beg of you to teach them better things than to ever allow themselves to be let down so low as to be steeped in the vice, corruption and villainy that would allow them to sacrifice the meanest wretch on earth, much less a neighbor and a friend, as their father has been. Be kind and true to each other. Do not contend about my property. You know my mind concerning it. Live faithful and humble before God, that we may meet again in the mansions of bliss that God has prepared for His faithful servants. Remember the last words of your most true and devoted friend on earth, and let them sink deep into your tender aching hearts; many of you I may never see in this world again, but I leave my blessing with you. FAREWELL.
I wish my wife Rachel to take a copy of the above, and all my family to have a copy of the original. My worthy attorney, W. W. Bishop, will please insert it in my record or history, should I not be able to write up my history to the proper place, to speak of my worthy friend Wm. H. Hooper. Please exonerate him from all blame or censure of buying the stock of that unfortunate company, as there is no truth in the accusation whatever. He is a noble, high-minded gentleman. And let it appear also of Bishop John Sharp, honorably, for the nobleness of the man who advanced me money in the time of trouble, and if my history meet with the favor of the public, pay those two gentlemen. My friends Hoge and Foster, as well as yourself and Spicer, some. You understand our agreement.